OK my friend told me a secret and told me if I told anyone he would NEVER forgive me but the nature of this secret makes me feel obligated to tell someone. Can someone please help me?!?:help:
My parents are out of the question... I now have foster parents/my best friend's parents and all Iwill say aabout the secret is I need to tell because he needs to get help for his sake and his infant son
he might want to tell someone, if its like that then he might be mad now but it would be for his own good later on
You can tell someone privately at school. I think they are called "guidance counselors" in America? If not, you can talk to the police anonymously, if need be. Even if it goes to court, you can remain anonymous (because of your age.) How serious is this thing? Could it result in loss of life, or injury?
I think the thing to do first is remind him that you are ALWAYS there for him. Always remind him that he matters, even if he is gay. Remind him that he matters to you, that he matters to his friends, his siblings, his parents even if he's gay. It might be a hard time right now for him, but it will get better. Does he know you're gay? This does seem to be a serious matter, I think it's good to try to convince him out of it. But such things cannot be handled easily, I would suggest to try to seek help from someone of authority.
Jesus. You aren't in the best place right now, are you Dylan. You have so much on your plate... First, it is probably best to come out to him (unless he wants to kill himself because he is religious.) Give him details for a few suicide hotlines and LGBT organizations in your area (ask at the school if necessary). You need to tell someone - probably someone in authority at your school. One living person is better than a dead friend, after all. Make sure you don't tell any students, but privately go to a guidance counselor or safeguarding officer (if that's what they are called) and explain the situation. You could try talking to the friend - say you are there for him and that he has something to live for - you. If he is a Christian, you could remind him that suicide is a cardinal sin (if you think that would help.) You could even direct him to this website so we can talk to him. Good luck, again.
Hang in there. I know that saying they'll never forgive you is so hard and you're going through so much right now but just know that it's always better to tell an adult on something like that than to risk not doing so and something happening
He wants to kill himself because his parents are like mine were and if they find out he is gay they'll take Connor(his son) and his parents are even more anti-social-in-the-name-of-Christianity than mine were
Give him this information, this will put him in touch with someone with more experience to talk to. The Trevor Project
His parents can't take his son. It is not legal (unless your state has some crazy laws or he has already signed over responsibility.) How old is he, may I ask? Because if he is over 16, there is nothing his parents could do to take his child. (If I understand you correctly.) There is also no law about homosexuals taking care of children. Couldn't he outright lie to his parents if the accused him of being a homosexual? Because if he has a child, that is pretty solid evidence, if you are a Christian bigot with a one-sided view of the world. Directing him to links (like the one in the post above) could help, but I really have no idea about how you could directly help long-term.
he is 14 and his parents are kinda heartless the baby is a result of rape ---------- Post added 13th Apr 2015 at 01:01 PM ---------- and his parents know that
Oh, damn. I'm so sorry to hear that. Everything I said is irrelevant, then. I really don't know. Just tell him to phone a hotline. I feel like I should exit, now. I am not qualified to deal with a situation like this. Get help for him. That is the only advice I can give.
This is a difficult situation. In my university training, we learnt that to determine the degree of emergency in this kind of situation, you should ask the person if he/she has a suicide plan (how he will do it) and a time frame (when he will do it). If he has answers to both questions (or even just one), then you cannot keep that to yourself and need to act fast (he should be seen in E.R. and have psychiatric consultation). Otherwise try to support him as best as you can and refer him to what previous posters have suggested...
I told my dad... Well foster dad and he got in touch with some people to help him... Sex abuse counseling Tennessee Suicide Hotline The Solution Source LLC... And he kinda is DCS so yeah of course now DCS is involved
I think you did the right thing, make sure you keep in touch with your friend. I know dealing with DCS can be frightening, but it sounds better than the alternatives. We adopted our 15 year old son 3 years ago from the Indiana DCS. It was a long process but we fostered him for a year, and then adopted him. They were always difficult to deal with because they were busy, but they were good people.
Kudos to you for handling this maturely, and as a good friend. Your friend is getting the help he needs. My guess is as part of the therapy he's getting, he'll come to realize you actually WERE being a good friend and try and help him. AS others have said, do try and keep in touch with him and be there for him- let us know how thing go.
I'm glad you were able to tell someone. He probably confided in you because he secretley hoped you would tell someone, otherwise he wouldn't have said anything.
