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More reasons not to come out to my parents..

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by choirsmash, Apr 21, 2015.

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  1. choirsmash

    choirsmash
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    My mom was talking to my one neighbor. They were talking about her daughter who is like 2 years older than me, she's in college. Apparently she's converting to Catholicism which is cool I guess and she's said she's a lesbian. So yeah that's all nice and great and stuff but my mom was telling me this and she said she thought that was kind of counterintuitive...my dad, to my surprise, was the one to respond in a somewhat defensive manner. He asked her why it would be counterintuitive and didn't really understand what my mom was saying. I understood, don't particularly agree. But, then again, I wouldn't exactly call myself catholic right now..so I'm not too offended. I hadn't realized that my mom thought this way. I'm becoming more aware of her saying slightly homophobic things and it bugs me. My dad doesn't say much on the topic, this is the first I've heard him say something about it and I'm glad it was positive. A month ago, I would've said that if I were to come out to a parent at this moment, it would not be my dad. Now, I think I would be more comfortable telling my dad...still uncomfortable with the thought of telling either of them, but you get the jist. This makes things difficult. Ugh
     
    #1 choirsmash, Apr 21, 2015
  2. resu

    resu
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    Don't worry, you should only come out when you are comfortable enough and not a moment too soon. I think things will be better once you're in college and can finally get some freedom.
     
    #2 resu, Apr 21, 2015
  3. amigec

    amigec
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    Yes, I agree with resu. Come out when you're ready. Maybe this was a minor setback in your plans to come out. To me your mom's response was pretty mild, which is good. Just sounds like a little bit of misunderstanding on her part. I'm happy that your dad has more of a positive view of homosexuality. They may or may not realize that you could be gay. So if you tell them, it may be a shock, like it is with some parents. But I am confident that they'd accept you and love you no matter what. Just hang in there and when you feel it's the right time to tell them, then go for it!
     
    #3 amigec, Apr 22, 2015
  4. spockbach

    spockbach
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    Things can get so complicated when it comes to telling parents. Are you out to any friends? And yes, don't come out until you feel the time is right, and you feel it's something you really do want to do.
     
    #4 spockbach, Apr 22, 2015
  5. choirsmash

    choirsmash
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    Well, I had to tell them today. I was nowhere near ready.
    My dad had been on my LHU email account and read an email I sent asking about their LGBT or GSA organizations. I'm annoyed about that. They approached me about it and I had to tell them. It sucked. I don't feel any better about it. They said they were supportive but they also said they hope I end up straight (told them I still wasn't sure) and my dad told me I just haven't found the right guy yet. I wouldn't say it went better than I expected it to..it was different from my expectation, though. That being said, I had a whole plan for how it was gonna happen and a general idea of when..UGH:bang::tears:
     
    #5 choirsmash, Apr 22, 2015
  6. amigec

    amigec
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    After this lingers for a little while, misterkawhat, they will start to accept the fact that you're gay. Your parents want the best for you. They don't want to see you go through the hardships that lgbt people can face. If they are willing, talk to them more about it. Maybe join a support group. It's always better for parents to understand the lgbt community and that there's so much more of us then what people realize. To understand that there's nothing wrong with being gay and that the world is slowly progressing towards a liberal thinking about the lgbt community. Just give this time, let it settle, then talk about it more with them. Good luck and congratulations.
     
    #6 amigec, Apr 23, 2015
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