This might be a little long, but: Basically, I met this guy at my job 2 and a half years ago. I was 18 and he was 26. During this time, I was starting to realize that I was gay and I was extremely uncomfortable about my sexuality, so whenever I had a crush on a guy, I would completely avoid them and try not to have any contact with them, if I could help it. My friend (who was just a coworker to me at the time), however, practically forced me to acknowledge his existence. He would give me cutesy nicknames, comment about how good I looked, get really touchy feely, stare at me from across the room (sometimes, he would keep looking at me even if I caught him), etc. This caused me to go crazy over him and I developed the biggest crush I've ever had on him. After he left the job, I started hanging out with him as a friend as opposed to just being a coworker. About a year ago, I came out to him and he was okay with it. However, for a small amount of time, he would practically go out of his way to prove how straight he was to me (he'd comment on practically every single girl he saw on the street). As for what things are like now, he still flirts with me. He only flirts with me a little bit when he's sober, but he flirts with me a lot when he's drunk. In fact, it's made things pretty awkward at parties because he's done flirty stuff in front of huge groups of people (who I still work with) and you can just tell that a few of them got weird vibes from it. So anyway, here's the main point of this topic. How can I tell him I like him in the least disastrous way possible? I know that he's definitely not going to say he likes me, but I feel like I need to do this so that I can get some form of closure. Also, if I do tell him I like him, then maybe he won't flirt with me anymore and it'll be easier to get over him. Does anyone have any advice?
Just go for it. It might be scary but it's a huge relief to get this out. When your conversation takes you to love life talk or crushes or your future, tell him you need to get something off your chest and say that you like him. You might say you didn't expect anything, you just wanted to let go and move on and it was your way of doing it. And maybe he actually does like you? You'll never know unless you tell him. Good luck!
Tell him when he's sober at least, lol. But, don't expect a lot because if he says he's straight and is still flirting with you, then he still has a way to go in being comfortable with his sexuality (if he's really "not straight"). Whatever happens, just observe how he acts with you and call him out if he keeps sending mixed messages. That's all you really can do besides just not interacting with him at all.
I asked him if he used to like me and he got pretty upset about it. I brought up the weird flirty stuff he used to do and he insisted that he acted that way with all of his friends. He said it was really weird that I was asking him this. He made it out like I was really crazy, but I don't see why... I mean, even if he really is straight, surely he can see why constantly slapping the butt of a gay coworker he barely knew at the time would spark some curiosity? In all honesty, I purposely shot myself in the foot here. There was pretty much no way anything was going to happen between us and it's for the best, really. I just hope things aren't extremely awkward from now on lol.
