So there's this girl that i have liked ever since i met her (about 3 months ago) and i kinda thought she might like me back. Except she didn't know i'm gay, and i didn't know if she was. But we always spent lots of time together and laughed and climbed trees and just had a wonderful time, and from the way she acted sometimes i thought she might like me back. So yesterday i told her i'm gay after wanting to do it for a while (i've never told anyone i liked that before so this was kinda a big deal for me) And turns out she is a straight human, so she definitely does not like me back Now i'm not sure how i feel..like my emotions are a mess I am obviously sad that she isn't gay so i have no chance with her, but i'm also relieved cos i finally told her. Cos wondering whether she is or is not gay was driving me crazy, and now at least i know..even if its not the answer i wanted. But i am kinda proud of myself for actually telling her, cos i've wanted to do it for a while but i always chickened out before. Also she didn't react badly, like i was really worried that she would freak out that i liked her and not want to be my friend anymore, or that it would make her uncomfortable or change the way she acted towards me. But 5 minutes after i told her we were joking and laughing and everything was normal, like nothing had really changed between us. Her reaction was just like "yea alright, that's cool. I'm not gay though". So now we can just be friends and nothing has really changed so that's not so bad i suppose. The other thing is she is being really sweet about it, like yesterday evening after i went home she sent me a really sweet text, she basically said thanks for telling her and that she was there if i ever wanted to talk about stuff or anything. And obviously i really appreciate that, but her being so sweet kinda makes me like her more, and i need to stop liking her in that way now cos its useless. So basically i don't really know how i feel now, like im sad but relieved and i wanna keep being friends with her but also i need to get myself to stop liking her That is all ...i dont really know what the point of this post is, i guess i just wanted to write out how i'm feeling (cos writing usually helps me sort out my emotions) and share it with people who maybe feel/have felt the same way.
Hey there. I hope posting this helped you! If you're feeling down, just remember: you came out to someone, and they were supportive. That's a really great thing that came out of this, even if it wasn't exactly the result you were looking for. It seems like you're having a lot of mixed feelings right now. This girl sounds lovely, and if you do need to distance yourself from her for a little while in order to get over your crush, I'm sure she'd understand that if you explained it to her. So that's an option that could help you with clearing your head. In terms of feeling sad and relieved, hopefully the sadness will diminish over time and you'll just be relieved that you told her. If you need to chat, I'm around x
Well you might cherish your friendship... and enjoy it... and concerning partners, you might look elsewhere... there might be lgbt centers, with activities... You might think about joining a sports club... there might even be clubs for gay people... or watch sports with female players... or go to concerts of singers lesbians tend to like... I'd say take the time you need... hugs
Wow, I can totally relate and just want to say I'm 26 and want to give you a big hug! Honestly, I was not at all confident to do that when I was younger and it took me years before I admitted to my my friend that I had crushed on her and asking her if she liked me back? For me, I think it was really surprising for her because she was more experimenting with her sexuality and herself way more than I was, also I had felt something through kissing her .. etc This continued now into today with someone I barely knew.. in which I was so intensely attracted to them.. I kept it all inside... which in all honesty is the WORST thing you can do... looking back I'm pretty sure this other girl knew and wanted me to tell her.. but regardless I'm really glad your friend reacted that way and was sensitive to your situation. She sounds cool and it seems like you guys have a really strong bond. My advice to you would be to talk about this this with someone.. just to at least get it out of your system. Crushes especially the intense ones can take a lot of emotion out of you. I totally get the omg what's your sexuality to your crush and looking for signs. I agree, distance from this person might really help you out. I hope this helps and let me know if you'd like to talk more
Well the girl is a transfer student at my university, and she is only here for one semester, so in about two months she will be going back home to Germany. So i don't really want to distance myself from here, cos i only have a short time left in which to enjoy her company, and i do want to remain being her friend. I just have to get over my crush, but i guess that will happen in summer when i won't be seeing her anymore.
