Hey guys I need some input other than my friends that tell me just what I want to hear lol. So I find myself randomly thinking about this girl that I had sex with a few months ago. We first met and I was wasted and tried to have Sex w/ her but she had a boyfriend. ( she suggested we all have a 3 some then her and I have sex alone) I said no and that was that. Then she hits me up 4 months later asking to be friend( she was now single) honestly I just assumed that "let's be friends "meant sex, so that's how I pursued her. I got drunk then met her at a bar and we went home and had sex. She said she was bi but done with boys. I ended up really liking her actually, she sang and played the guitar for me, was full of great conversation, and we even bathed together, but I was insecure in the morning and left at like 8 and all I said was" thanks for letting me stay" we had a really great night and I feel like we connected but all i wanted to do was run away in the a.m. So we went the entire day w/o talking then I asked her if she had fun and she said yes let's do it again. So we did the next night, I was drunk. Then the morning comes and she tried to have sex but I kinda deny her and make an excuse to leave. I think I cameoff rude acted like I didn't wanna be there but I was so anxious. She even offered to take me home and I told her I would walk ( ugh I so regret saying that!) . That morning she also told me she was going tell her mom about us and her bed was my bed. But I asked her to hangout again and she makes excuses of why she can't and ignores me. I ran into her at school a few weeks after and we exchanged only a few words, I was being awkwardly distant again. Then she hugs me for a long time, tells me my hair smells good and says nice seeing you. Gosh, I feel so lame for replaying this in my head but I just don't understand what happened. I won't think about it but then randomly at times I do. It's like I'm searching for an answer to what happened and why it didn't work. I know I need to move on. But was it my behavior that causedthis or was she just experimenting ? Ugh I hope I don't do this to another girl again.
Probably your behavior, to be brutally honest, most likely your behavior. I know at the time you were nervous when you ran out in the morning after sex but did you ever think to tell her that maybe? You make it seem like a "fling" so she might be avoiding you to protect her feelings and not get hurt like you potentially did when you ran away. I understand you didn't do it on purpose but try to explain this because it doesn't seem like she's experimenting to me but its up to you whether you want to move on.
Thanks for the input @woahthatsboring, I know it was my behavoir and I regret it. I wish I could move on... do you really think it's up to me to move on? I mean its been about three months and we havent talked. I asked her to go to dinner after it all happened but she kept making excuses. Buuut when I saw her she was very fliratious.. I just dont know what to do . I feel different now but I'm sure she probably moved on.
I wouldn't assume it was all you. She seemed to go at lightspeed. 2 or 3 "date" nights and she's going to tell her mom about the two of you, and you are welcome to stay with her. She may have realized that, and wanted a little distance as she figured herself out. I would be open and honest with her. Maybe write a not so long note to her stating exactly what your issues are. I think that would give you, either the opportunity to reconnect, or closure with her.
If you think she's worth it, fight. But if you think the situation is gone down hill and it's no returning- that's something you should consider. Not to be all negative but it's all your choice on whether you pursue her or not, she's going to respond to whatever you do next so consider those things and go from there. If you think she's worth fighting for, talk to her in person about having dinner that way it's harder for her to refuse. After that, go from there and explain. Good luck
