Hello, I'm currently in college and living with a guy (Nate) who I went to high school with. He's straight, and I have some confused feelings about him but, that's not really here nor there and definitely not the point of this. The town that we come from is hella conservative, it's small and just very closed minded, but I would also like to say that it's kind of accepting in the same sentence. For instance I was very much out in high school and I didn't have any problems with bullying or doing anything that I wanted. But, yesterday Nate and I were watching American Sniper, and we were at one of the parts where he and his wife were really struggling to communicate because he wouldn't tell her anything about what he had been through. Regardless of how the movie played out, at the time he we both had opinions of what was happening. He was calling her unsupportive and ignorant basically, saying that she should understand what he's going through and just leave him alone - while I was saying that she can't understand something she doesn't know. I felt as though had he just spit out what was bothering him, she could have consoled him or tried at least and they would have moved on. She would have a better idea of what he was going through and he would feel better knowing that she was actively trying to have his back in whatever way she could, regardless of how minuscule it may have been in the range of the situation. However, he said that he couldn't tell her because she couldn't handle it, and I said that for one you're actively making a decision telling her that she can't possibly handle the stories, and that's not right to assume. Two, it just comes down to that he simply didn't want to talk about it anymore. He knew how to word it, and I would say that while he may not want to relive it, it's happening anyway so he'd do better to spit it out. It came down to him saying that as a woman she couldn't possibly understand because she doesn't have the mental capacity to handle it. Which opened the doors to all kinds of questions with me needing to understand how that made any sense. So he's lowkey a misogynist is what I found out. While I don't agree, he admitted to it and I appreciated that he could be honest. What I don't appreciate it how he seems to feel as though he's superior to someone because they were born with a different anatomy. While I agreed that women are typically "wired" differently than men are given the blatant differences in hormones and the way our minds act on them, I would never tell someone that because of that they couldn't pick up a weapon and fight, or be president ( which came up). He also relates me to being a woman because I'm gay, something we have yet to talk about but he's made multiple references to. It was something that I had thought about, and definitely intended to bring up to him, but after the conversation we had yesterday I've just really been seething with irritation. So because he sees me as a woman, which is an entirely different situation in its self, he seems to think that there are only certain things that I can do? On top of that, he sees himself to be superior to me in this context. I'm not sure if I'm being a tad bit sensitive because of that, but I'm seriously feeling some type of way. Opinions would be appreciated, sorry for the extreme wall of text.
