Hi, My name is Ann. I am happy in a relation with my girlfriend. I want to commit myself to her, but we have a problem. She’s gonna go away to another country to study there for 1 year. I afraid that she can meet somebody else there, or cheat on me :tears: . What can I do? How can I look after her, when she is far from me?
Hello Ann, This is something you're going to have to discuss with her, not with us. Yes, a long-term relationship can work, provided both partners are dedicated to making it work. Have you asked her whether she wants to stay together? It may seem intimidating, but if you don't talk about it, you two are going to separate by default when she moves. So ask her how she feels about staying together. If she doesn't want a long-distance relationship, then you'll have to respect that. If she agrees, though, there's a chance you can make it work. But for that, we need to address this here: Trust issues. She may very well meet someone there. To be honest, she may meet someone anywhere and cheat on you anytime. If you two decide to stay together, you should bring up your concerns and talk it out. Communication is very important in this case. One year isn't that long, depending on how you look at it. If you haven't been together very long, it may seem huge. Is there any possibility of one of you going to where the other is at the half-way mark (after four or five months, if she's only there say 9 months for the school year)? Even if not, you have phone calls, snail letters (still romantic), postcards (because another country!), email, Facebook, and Skype (video calls are as close as you can get to the real thing! You can watch movies together, have long-distance dates...).
I thought about it. But I can't , U see, I can't trust a person who has betrayed her former girlfriend. I do not want to get stabbed in the back and learn about it in a year or two. If anyone knows what SpyToMobile application is, please tell me. A person who had a similar situation advised it to me on similar forum. She caught the cheater with this app.
If you feel the need to use something like SpyToMobile, I would call it quits with your girlfriend now Ann. I'm sorry if that sounds like harsh advice, but if you feel the need to monitor her mobile phone it's a sign that your relationship is on very shaky ground. You just can't do that in a normal, healthy relationship. Added to that, you said: I just can't see you coping with all of this Ann. It sounds like you already have serious trust issues and it's likely to get much worse. You need to talk to your girlfriend and do some serious thinking.
Trust is all you have in a LDR. If you don't have that then let her fly. Sorry to say but you must trust her!
Not being nasty but if I was with someone and found out they had a spy app on my phone they'd be long gone and the phone too. If you don't trust her enough not to stray then she isn't the one for you a and honestly you aren't for her.
My fears were grounded. My gf went to a party this saturday and cheated on me there. I read her texts and she agreed to meet with some Judy. Thanks to SpyToMobile. Don't take it all on trust alone.
