I have a friend (we're not best friends), I'll call him J, who throughout last year and earlier this year was very touchy-feely with me, emotionally and physically. But first I should make something clear: I think J is straight, though we used to tease him by saying he was gay. He would always massage my shoulders from behind when I was working during break and lunch, and one day, out of the blue, he hugged me on the bus back home from school and said that he "loved me, even if nobody else did" (I only have two close friends). After a time when for one reason or another we didn't see much of each other, his best friend said that J had started doing exactly the same things he had done to me to him. I asked J's best friend if he had done this before and he said that no, he hadn't done anything like this before (they've known each other since they were 7 and they're both 18 now). Do you think his behaviour meant anything in particular? I had a crush on him at the time but didn't want to assume that his close-up behaviour meant anything. Any similar experiences? Thanks for any replies, Connor
It's really hard to say. He could just be a really touchy-feely person and experimenting with this part of him (like trying to be really close to other people). It could be that he's a bit curious about his sexuality, but again it's really hard to say and I think it would take more evidence to be sure it could be that. Is his best friend gay/bi or straight? Because it could mean something if he's mostly like this around guys that could be attracted to him, but that still wouldn't be a sure sign. Sorry this probably didn't help much but I say just keep an eye on how he acts in the future.
It helped! His friends are the kinda sporty guys who go to the gym and are very forward with women. I'm definitely not in that group and his best friend is on the fringe of that group so it could be that he was looking for people outside of that group to try whatever out on. Yeah, it will ultimately come down to more evidence I guess.
Anyone else got an idea or two? I'd like to know what other people think because I'm definitely not sure.
Well, I got a personal experience with a best friend of mine. We snuggled, slept together (like actually slept together, not sex), held hands, kissed, not the lips, and said I love you. At first, neither of us thought much but as we got closer, realized we had feelings for each other. Hers were stronger, I was in denial and slightly homophobic, but it worked out in the end. She really likes me. And now we are together and stuff. Is he only close to you in that way? Or does he do it to others? I have friends who are touchy with all their close friends, and they're totally straight. My girlfriend was only touchy feely with me. I think that is important to know, who else he does it to. And other than that, I think bubbles123 have good advice. I agree with her on that. He could just be experimenting or trying to get close to people. You should probably wait it out and see what happens
As I said in my post, loveislove01, he did it to me for over a year - and to my best knowledge it was only me at that time - and then after he stopped doing it to me he stopped for 4/5 months and now does it just to his best friend. It's confusing and we still talk and stuff loads.
