Ok so I am 24 years old and currently living at home temporary long story short my bf died and circumstances caused me to move back home in February. Well my mom is a avid meddler and when I want my right to privacy she quickly assumes I am bottling things up. My intentions are I am a adult who can handle my own situations and have every right to privacy for that reason. She does need to know what I do 24/7 or what I am going through all the time but she acts like it is my obligation to tell her things or she thinks I am displaying a unhealthy behavior of bottling things up. She does this to my sisters, my dad but I won't have it. I like taking care of things myself without having to spill every detail.
I am sorry to hear about your boyfriend. I have a mom who gets into my business a little too much as well. My aunt asked me to feed her cat while she went away for the weekend and my mom panicked when I didn't tell her I was going. Often she leaves without telling me anything but if I walk out the door without her knowing where I am at/who I am with she panics or questions why she cannot know. I think she is personally like this because I was diagnosed at 13 with Depression, and then 15 or 16 with social anxiety disorder. She has seen in the past how I handled my depression and anxiety which was usually by withdrawing from people. Also I am an introvert so even when I am not experiencing problems I like to vacate. After being on my own for some time I am used to doing whatever I want, whenever I want without having to answer to someone. I could just walk out of my apartment, grab my bike and hit the trails. Nobody knew. It was perfect for someone like me. Being home things have changed. I have found ways to hide or be sneaky in order to have my privacy. This website is excellent, along with talking to someone I met online but not in person, or I meet up with old friends at the college I go to so my parents cannot see or even know about the thing happening. I guess compromising if important. I try to decide what I will tell and what I will keep private- I tend to make statements without elaborating or giving further explanation. Be strong, I totally get not wanting to have mother know everything. Ugh.
Thanks I been better at hiding stuff that she might see and question me about and I try to interact as much as possible like not being in my room the whole time and stuff like that. Being interactive and just acting cool is the best approach to avoid her nagging. Just got to hit every trick in the book. I too had depression and anxiety and that may be part of it but it is something she does to everyone not just me. Having a private life is not self destructive at all so it is problem she will have to deal with.
