See, generally, when you want to NOT crush on a guy you have no chance with, you just cut him from your life. (Or if you're a girl, the same applies) However, what are you supposed to do when you work with this person?! I'm gonna make this totally personal. I can't just quit my job to get away from the guy! Of course, there's always the voice in the back of my head that says, "Maybe you have a chance! Anything could happen!" I've ignored that as much as possible ever since he told me about one of the girls he got with. My sister thinks he's at least interested in being friends with me because he asks questions about my life, makes eye contact quite often, and smiles a lot when talking to me. So, I guess what I'm asking here is - I don't know. I know he's not interested in me, or I have to assume that for the safety of my poor heart :lol: So, what should I do? I told myself I was no longer in the business of caring about people who don't return the favor - at least not in the same way. However, I also have to work with him for the summer, and I can't just be cold and mean for no reason! If I'm not cold and mean, he'll want to be friends, and I don't think I can handle that. So, the final question is. How do I keep this crush at bay without ruining my work relationship? Thank you for any advice or tips you can provide.
I know how that feels! I don't really have any tips - I guess try to avoid him as much as possible, only work-related talking and less eye contact should probably do. Are you sure he's not even slighlty interested in you? Is he straight? Oh, just grab his face and kiss him.
I don't mean to sound too brusque but I think the answer might lie in just being friends with him and not letting the 'crush' part take over As you move through your careers, you'll always find people you'll develop a crush on (it's human nature), especially if you work in nice places which attract good, educated, qualified people. You won't be able to avoid working with possible crushes every time. Sometimes you might be thrown in close contact with them thanks to your boss...what then? Making eye contact and smiling a lot is also something done by someone when he wants to be friends with you. It doesn't necessarily mean he wants to get with you in any other way than in having a beer with you (or, if you are like me, a coffee). Why would you want to be cold and mean, for crying out loud?! Be friendly! The thing is that eventually you'll get over your crush for him and you'd have gained a friend. If you just turn frozen then you'll lose a friend. He might or might not be gay, how does it really matter? Does that help? Or was it too preachy? ;-)
I'm pretty sure, considering he told me about one of the girls he got with, thatlonelyguy. I would love to, but I think I might get punched... or fired.... or maybe both. Closeteer, my only worry is that the crush part is very strong in me, and will more than likely take over. You make a good point about seeing attractive people all the time. I do have to learn how to deal with that. We're too young for beer, but yeah. I think that's true also. I think the issue stems from me not having a lot of guy friends, so when a guy does want to be friends, I instantly think he wants more. I need to stop doing that, and get used to the idea that it's not just girls who might want to be close to me. I want to be cold and mean because, when he has to leave in the fall, I want it to hurt less. I know it's not the smartest thing to do, but maybe not having this friend in the first place is better for me in the end? This has never ended well for me before. That's why I'm being so wary and cautious of this one. It was preachy, but it helped a ton! Thank you both for your thoughts and opinions on the matter. I'm probably going to continue losing my marbles for a while and then get over myself, but this certainly gives me a direction. I think I'll just take it slow and do my best to be friends with him before I allow my heart to even think about anything else.
