So, um, sooo, ummm... There is a guy I like, he's really cute, and nice, and funny. But he is homophobic... Today at school, he got sent to a deputy head teacher for shouting homophobic things across the classroom, because this guy said he bummed his (the guy I like) mum. There was a big thing, and a huge drama. But, does it make me a bad person, a bad gay person, for liking someone homophobic?:icon_sad:
If you like him for mostly physical aspects; and it is just a 'crush' - then it's completely normal to have an infatuation with him. You're not a bad person at all for this. Although, of course - having a relationship with him probably isn't possible... And he probably isn't someone you'd want to have in your circle
Never feel bad for who you happen to be into, there's no choice made. And anyway, even the fact you're acknowledging his bad behaviour is a good sign!
I wouldn't say so. He's probably secretly gay himself. Most homophobic people are. Maybe you still have a chance with him.
Of course it doesn't make you a bad person. The question you really need to ask yourself is, what do you find most attractive about him? Is it purely his looks, or something much deeper? Thinking back to my own school days, there were other boys who looked really hot, but that's all they had going for them. When it came to personality and attitude they were as ugly as hell. Some were a bit better, but they still had an ugly side to them that was really offputting. When we develop a crush on someone we need to look beyond looks and consider the whole person. It seems to me that the guy at your school has an ugly side to him too. Maybe you are a little bit blinded by the good stuff. Always consider the whole person before you let go of your emotions.
Its funny looking back at school photos and realising that everyone in my school was no where near as attractive as I thought they were at the time. Even now, looking at their grown-up Facebook pages, they're not attractive at all. I know this doesn't really add anything but yeah.
No, you are not a bad person. You just fell in love with the wrong guy (something uncontrollable by the way). The same thing happened to me. I fell for this really good looking, guy who was a homophobic. I had to move on. right now it might be a little hard the best thing you could do is the same. If it turn out later that he is gay, you might end up together. I'm all for happy ending.
i think you may experience a sense of needing space from said crush because if his homophobia will begin to bother you I had a serious crush on my childhood friend she was super religious and therefore saw no other means to cope but to walk from my life i was angry and hurt that her views ended the friendship anyway i put myself through three yrs of counselling as i was coming out the same time so it was a lot to deal with long story short said friend has been reaching out over email for the past couple of years and i am physically seeing her for the first time in ten yrs tomorrow AWKWARD
Yeah, nice people don't shout homophobic things... Remember that looks are just the most basic aspect of attraction; they need to be matched with personality and other internal aspects.
