So my dilemma is that I came out to my entire grade (about 530 people) before my own parents. I know that quite a few people confide in friends before family and it doesn't seem like too big of a deal unless of course your parents are homophobic and you're petrified of them. However, my experience with coming out to my parents was quite the opposite. First off I knew they had inklings here and there that I was something other than straight and I was fairly sure they were excepting of lgbt+ people and yet I was still mortified of them finding out. But anyway, the reason this moral crisis is arising now is because I've been wanting to order some gay pride things like a t-shirt and rainbow dog tog etc. and then it dawned on me that my parents still don't know I'm completely out (also there is no possibility of stealthily ordering my stuff due to the fact that I share an Amazon account with my mother lol) and I'm worried they will be offended that they weren't the first to know. So basically I would just really like advice on how I should approach them with this old/breaking news. (Gosh, this situation is oozing irony). Also I apologize for my incessant rambling and any help is much appreciated.
Just tell them. Since you think they will be accepting anyway, there is nothing to be afraid of. I know it still seems a little scary, but really, you had nothing to be afraid of. Just go and do your thing.
In my experience: parents would like to believe you're so comfortable with them that you'd tell them anything before you tell your friends. But: they have also been young. And trust me: they didn't run to their parents before their friends with everything either. So even if at first they are somewhat sad they weren't your first confidants, they will realise that is just the way of things. So: I guess the best path is to first tell your mom you'd like to use the shared account to order some GLBT paraphernalia. At this point, she'll probably mention that this means you'll be out to everyone. And... then it's a matter of explaining that, as muh as you'd have liked to tell them first, you wanted to talk this through with people who are in the same place in life. aka friends at school. And that you have many friends, but only one set of parents, so that you wanted to do it right when you came out to them. But that you love them very much and that their acceptance means a lot to you, more than just any random other kid at school. Will they be surprised? Maybe. But if they were accepting of you coming out, they will accept that this is how most people deal with it. And after a week or two, they'll most likely just be glad you were honest about it!
