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Average Problem

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by Nero360, Jul 13, 2015.

  1. Nero360

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    Im 15 a freshman and like this guy at school. I'm bi and was crying myself to sleep every night. I eventually learned to accept myself. So he been in my school for like 5-6 months and by the 2nd month I don't know what happened but when I was doing work we randomly looked at each other for about 10 seconds and I felt a chill through my whole body. But it felt good and it happened around 20 times for the rest of the month. Every time I look at him the chills got warmer and better I felt so happy every time!:icon_redf
    But then every Friday that I loved! Turn into a weekend of agony and depression!:bang:
    MY head goes wild every weekend thinking if he's gay, bi, or straight. I know if he's straight I just have to accept that. But I really think he's not. Because every time I look at him he stares into my soul and he smiles. One time he asked a general question in the class that i'd be quick to answer. I know I should just ask him his sexuality but we'd only been classmates for like 5 months. We are only friends in school. I thought i'd be weird to ask him if he wants to hangout after school. but that's mainly because i'm insecure and the other classmate would go GAAAAYYYYY! Like WTF how are you gay for asking to hangout. I have no problem with being bi, its just what other people think. and it does matter what other people think because if it didn't that 10% which is probably 40% would all come out of the closet.(BTW Im in summer school right now and Im at a school where class limits are 12 students in each room. but there are 7 students in our class now including me):eusa_doh: like idk because he seems friendlier around me. Also whenever we look at each other its because he's always looking me first then I look. half of the when I look back he's turns away is this because he isn't he gay or...... but whatever. Sometimes he makes random noises near me, is he trying to get my attention or whatever.(*hug*) Im always thinking so hard about what going on in his head but oh well! if anyone has or having an experience like this please help me I beg you.:tears: tell me if you think this guy is straight gay or bi! PLEASE(&&&)
     
  2. bubbles123

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    I don't think you have enough evidence to judge what his sexuality is and over-analyzing isn't going to help. If you don't want to just outright ask him, you should try just talking to him more. Are you out? Because mentioning to him that you're bi could make a difference. If you do, he may talk to you about his sexuality or something if he is in fact not straight. I think it would be good if you could hang out with him. Talk to him a bit more and maybe get a bunch of people together to do something and ask if he'd like to join if that's easier just to get the ball rolling. Hope this helps, best of luck!
     
  3. Nero360

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    Thanks! Especially coming from a girl. That is some amazing advice.
     
  4. Nero360

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    If theres anymore advice anyone can give me please do:icon_sad:
     
  5. warthog

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    Hi,

    Did you consider becoming a normal friend first ? I mean there's nothing wrong with asking someone what they do after school and like hang out or go bowling or something. try to chat him up, sit next to him in lunch and just act normally as any two teenage boys in school would, I'm sure you've made friends before so tap into how you do that and delete your physical attraction from the equation. once you two are chummy and like doing activities out of school, then you can explore what this is, and choose a strategy. I know it sounds calculating but it seems you really like this boy and it would be fun just finding ways to know him better.
    If you don't end up with a lover then at least you may end up with a cool friend, which isn't bad at all.
     
  6. Nero360

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    I think the problem is that I might not be the only one who sensitive and insecure I don't think things are going to work out if we are both this way. I don't know how to step up and be the one to ask. (BTW we have don't get summer school lunch) thx for the advice bro.
     
  7. Nero360

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    I think he doesn't see interest in me anymore. I think its because I'm not out. I'm out of hope. thanks guys for advice so far..... He probably thinks I'm straight....... its over.....
     
  8. Feline

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    A crush can makes us all giddy and anxious, especially when we are unsure if we have a chance with them or not, if they like us back or not. But try to calm down, don't stop enjoying your weekends or losing your sleep over this. Whenever you start thinking, stop yourself and do something you like, try to focus on whatever you like to do or on any chores (or homework) that you have to accomplish.

    If there are so many exchanges of glances and smiles, and especially if he is the one staring at you in the first place, to me it seems he likes you. Take it easy, no need to rush and come out to him or to anyone if you aren't ready, but I would suggest you to try to hang out with him so you get to know him better. Maybe you can start by talking to him about casual things in school once in a while, before you ask him to hang out somewhere else. If you feel comfortable doing so, find an opportunity to talk to him during a break or before/after school starts/finishes.

    Good Luck! :slight_smile:
     
  9. Gravity

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    Hanging out would definitely be a good idea. People do it all the time - I don't think that just hanging out would draw any attention, really.

    As far as asking him if he's attracted to guys - it may be more comfortable all around for you to tell him first that you're bi. He can add to that and out himself if he wants to - but asking someone is the sort of question that really can't go unanswered. When the time comes that you feel like you're comfortable telling him about you, let him decided if he's comfortable telling you about himself. :slight_smile:
     
  10. guitar

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    It's really hard to judge from what you've written what his sexual orientation is - it's anyone's guess.

    I would try a hangout, like Gravity said. Maybe mention an LGBT topic or LGBT characters on a show. Maybe even mention to him you're bi if it seems to fit naturally in a conversation and you feel ready. Otherwise, you can do what a coworker did to me and just say "Do you mind if I ask you a personal question.... are you gay?"
     
  11. Nero360

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    Thanks, Anymore Advice?
     
  12. Nero360

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    Now Things are back on track now all I need to do is talk with him when I get the chance. And then hang out with him! YAY!

    ---------- Post added 17th Jul 2015 at 09:32 AM ----------

    Nevermind.......... We can only hangout in school...... I live in Bridgewater and he live in New Brunswick....:icon_sad: :frowning2:
     
  13. warthog

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    I am following your story intently .... (!)
     
  14. Nero360

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    For like the past week he's been looking at me and I haven't been looking back...... I should take every chance I can to talk and make eye contact.
     
  15. Nero360

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    Do you guys thinks I should forget it and move on or take another chance and for the whole week try to talk and hang out?
     
  16. Nero360

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    WOW I ran into him at a store and didn't say anything. IM SO DUMB!:bang: UGH! He was even was about say hi and I just walked right passed him. When I saw him I was so happy yet so scared I don't know why? :confused: :bang:
     
  17. Nero360

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    Good News! We talk for awhile but then..... he started studdering and walked away. ????????????
    Maybe I was wrong about him liking me?
     
  18. Nero360

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    Hey Guys What's UP! We are talking like crazy, I never knew how talkative he was considering he's so quiet. It's like when we are together he opens up to me. I love this feeling I get through my body when we talk. I don't know if I like him or I just a new feeling from friends, because I never had any friends. .......... I didn't have any friends until he showed up. I think is because of my insecurity, low-self esteem and social anxiety. Do I like him as a friend or lover?
     
  19. warthog

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    Just try to live the moment and don't overthink it, and don't scare him away. become good friends and then who knows. still following intently. (!)
     
  20. Cider

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    Ask him how he feels about gay rights, and if he has any gay friends. If he responds positively, that's a step ahead.

    However, I'm also going to be a little blunt.

    If I were you, I wouldn't try anything, and I would try to get over him, because a lot of these cases where a gay guy falls head over heels over his straight friend never end well. I unfortunately, know from experience.

    Nevertheless, good luck mate! :slight_smile: