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Advice for an on going friend w/ benefit relationship?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by Leifa, Jul 29, 2015.

  1. Leifa

    Regular Member

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    Was debating if I should post this or not..I'm normally pretty decent with this type of problem but I think I could use some advice. I'm actually pretty embarrassed to post this :frowning2:

    18+ content vvvv

    So I made a new friend a few months ago(yay!) We pretty much immediately hit it off when we started to talk for the first time. Talking led to flirting and flirting led to sex. After we talked for awhile again and she said she wasn't really much for one night stands anymore and I agreed so we exchanged info to text etc... She blew up my phone first few days with stuff. We made it pretty clear to each other that we were NOT looking for a romantic relationship or dating. She wanted to see me again. We ended up sleeping together again and after testing the waters so to speak discovered we were incredibly sexually compatible. Pretty much it was amazing.

    After that we still talked alot but some other stuff happened that wasn't between her and me that I'd rather not get into right now. Pretty much the second time was the last time because we couldn't sleep with each other anymore because of said thing.

    The situation changed recently so that we could "see" each other again and she came to me and told me she wanted to start being like she was, flirty with a bunch of people but wasn't interested in sex with anyone at the moment. After a pause she said with one exception, me. I don't think I've ever been so sexually attracted to someone before so I was happy to hear this.

    Anyway so that was all back story and this last bit is what I want advice on.
    So pretty much since she told me we're back "on" nothing has really happened. I've been playful.Talked still. Not as much as before but still have.
    So I'm a bit confused, she hasn't been incredibly receptive and isn't making any moves herself. Which would be fine if she hadn't said what she said. Should I "let it go" and just forget about it or wait for her to make advances like the first two times or do it myself?

    This situation has been weird and I don't know if its appropriate to be asking about it...sorry.
     
  2. Fentrion

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    Maybe she wants to be pursued. I'd let it go if I were you. Life is too short to waste on such confusing situations, mixed messages or people whose actions don't match up with their words.

    I hope you can find someone with whom you are more compatible with.
     
  3. resu

    Advisor Full Member

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    Yes, actions speak louder than words. You might just ask more directly if she's just not available or something else is holding her back. But, you should also ask yourself what's really stopping you from looking elsewhere? This isn't a committed relationship, and a few months is hardly enough to make a solid friendship.