Just five minutes ago I found out that my parents are planning to get divorced. They said that it was a mutual decision, and they're both still friends, and it's not an aggressive breakup and blah blah blah but I'm still devastated and unsure of what to do. The house I live in now is the second house I've ever lived in, and I can't remember anything from my old house. My brother has lived here almost his entire life, and now we have to sell it. My safe haven is now for sale, or it will be in a couple of months. They SAY that they have no current plans to seek new relationships, but I know one day they'll get remarried. I know it's not right for me to be so infuriated with the thought of them being in happy relationships but I can't help but feel like I'll never accept new people as family, let alone parents. My parents are the ones who raised me, not some strangers that walk in years later. :bang: Not to mention that they talked to my (gender) therapist about it, too. I don't know why this bothers me, I guess I'm just kind of upset that I didn't get to talk to her about it first. I don't understand why I'm so sad about that. :icon_sad: I really don't know what to think or say anymore, I'm just so mad at them and I feel like I'll never be able to look at them the same way. I never saw any signs of them being unhappy in their relationship, so this is a huge shock to both me and my brother. I honestly wish their breakup had been more angry, so then I could've had time to mentally prepare to hear this. I don't even want to talk to them right now, which I know is really unfair for them but I feel like I'm gonna throw up and I can't even think about much without getting chocked up. :tears: If anyone has any advice, please let me know. :help:
*hugs* Oh honey, this is really tough. It's hard when your parents divorce, even if you're a teen or adult. It's just the rock of your life crumbling. But you know what? That doesn't mean your whole life is falling apart. It's hard, it's painful and you've a big right to be angry, sad, and frustrated. On the subject of telling your therapist, why don't you ask if you can tell him/her first? Just say you're upset and want to talk about it first. That seems reasonable to me. And really, I don't know them but unless they've hinted at it before they might take a good while before they see other people and cause more upheavals. You're going to be ok. You just need to ride out this really hard time now. Let yourself cry and curse and feel whatever you feel. It's important to let it out. *hugs more*
It's okay to feel upset and grief because you have lost the idea of a "regular family". However, you must remember that your parents are adults, and they have a right to decide what they want to do with their lives. While it may seem out-of-the-blue, they wouldn't have come to this decision lightly, and it's infinitely better if they separate amicably than by arguing.
Thank you so much for the reply ;u; I know that its okay to feel sad/mad but sometimes I feel awful because I know its for the best... I suppose its natural, though, so ill try to work through my feelings with that in mind. Thanks again! (*hugs*) ---------- Post added 6th Aug 2015 at 11:29 PM ---------- Thanks a ton for the reply ^u^ I know that this divorce will make their lives much happier, I guess I just have to wait awhile for my emotions to calm down so I can feel happy with them. I just hope that things get easier from now on
