My best friend and I have known each other since childhood, and are now in our twenties. We recently both came out to each other as gay, which excited me as I had loved him for long before that. However, when I confessed my feelings for him, I was met with the reality that they were not shared. The pain this has caused me is very difficult to cope with for me. The worst part is that even though he is willing to continue the friendship, I don't think that I will be able to. Just to be near him or see his name on social media kills me, as it's a constant reminder of what happened and how much it hurt me. Any advice is appreciated. Thank you. David
A healthy friendship can enhance your life and there is nothing quite like the support and love you receive from a friend. It's a special kind of love; very different to the sort of loving relationship you will have with a boyfriend, but it's still something to treasure. Unfortunately the lines do become blurred for some people. Boyfriends may come and go, other relationships may be strained and may fail altogether, but the bonds of true friendship can last a lifetime and it's really important to remember that Dave. It may hurt that your feelings are not reciprocated, but sometimes we need to step back from the hurt and recognise what we do have, rather than what we don't have. Why would you cast out of your life, someone who has been there since childhood? Why cut yourself off from all of that love and support? The best advice I can offer is to focus on the idea of meeting someone who can return your feelings. If you can build a relationship with someone who wants the same as you it will help you to recover your friendship, rather than abandon it altogether and that's got to be the best outcome, don't you think?
PatrickUK, As much as I don't want to accept it, I know that you're right. I don't know how I'm going to be able to sit in the same room with him though and not feel the pain. It's going to be tough. And it's really not easy to just find someone who I feel for that will love me in return. But deep down when I put my emotions aside, I know that your advice is the right thing to do. I'm also terrified of developing more hope that he could change his mind if I misinterpret any of his actions. That will be my downfall in terms of moving on. Thank you for your advice. Dave
