Trying to figure this girl thing out (and failing)

Hi everyone,

as i said in my presentation post, i've only recently realized and begun to accept my bisexuality. Everything was triggered by a huge crush i (still) have on a girl i worked with for two weeks. On the last day of working together we went to the beach just the two of us and she told me she was gay (i suspected it, but didn't allow myself to believe it) and we've been texting/talking/seeing each other when we can ever since.

Nothing physical ever happened between us but there's definitely a great energy, and we care about each other. I went to see her in the city she lives in (about 1.5hrs away) and she came to visit me after a couple of weeks. She had a girlfriend, and when she came to see me she told me she had broken up with her. They are still broken up.

Problem is, i feel all i'm reading from her are mixed signals. And i think it's because i'm such a noob since i've only dated boys - who in my experience are much more straightforward.
One moment i feel like she's clearly friend-zoning me, the next one i think she's giving me hints (like soft strokes to my arm). She texts me things like "it's true that when a door closes another one opens, you arrived into my life at the right time and i'm sure you'll come back at the right time", and then she calls me "friend" (is friend a 'dirty word' in the lesbian world like it is in the straight one? you know, the "he sees me like a friend" conundrum, is that a thing?)

I'm already dealing with processing all these new feelings for a girl, i can't imagine making a move on someone whose feelings i'm really not sure of. And i just feel soooo stupid, at 29 years of age!
Am i imagining things? i really need some guidance here :eusa_doh:

 

i know it's really tricky and extra frustrating. The fact that we live very far away from each other doesn't help.

i'm sending her a birthday gift tomorrow (her bday is on the 20th) which i've been putting together for the past two weeks, and i think clearly states that i care about her more than just a friend, and i've been wondering whether it's a mistake or not to even send it at all. I'm so not used to doing tese things - especially for a girl! - and yet the thought of taking care of her makes me all warm and fuzzy inside :icon_redf

 

Your advice wasn't sucky at all! Thanks for taking the time, I'm sending her the gift today and we'll see what happens. you're right, I would regret it if I didn't do it

 

That's very sweet of you to say! thank you!
and... present is on its way!

 

I will (*hug*) thanks for your words, right now i'm pretty sure what we have is just "the beginning of a beautiful friendship" but hey, she's a really cool person so even if it was just that i'm happy to have her in my life.

ChazL - it is a painful time, but don't feel stupid! why don't you start opening up with your friend about possibly being attracted to girls? you don't need to tell her that you like her, just strike up the conversation and see what happens. And good luck to you too!

 

I'm bumping this thread up cause I just got a text from her last night that left me 100% baffled. The text only said "❤️" and it came out of nowhere (it was a non sequitur, it wasn't a reply to a previous message) and she sent it at 4.40am her time.
I immediately thought "she Sent it to the wrong person", sometimes it happens to me too, I write in the wrong chat box esp in iChat or whatsapp.
I'm so scared that she might have just texted me by mistake, I wish I had the guts to ask her but obv I freaked out and didn't. I replied and I haven't heard from her yet.
Ugh, girls. I whish I could just see her, I miss her a lot but she lives really far away :/