Okay, so before I begin I do want to say that I understand that everyone reacts to things differently than how they like to think they would. But this is still very frustrating. So my mom swears up and down that she is open minded to all orientations and, in general, all walks of life. However when it comes to her kids she doesn't want any of us to have a deviation from the "norm", because she feels that it reflects poorly on her parenting...this pisses me off for a few reasons: First, you can't parade around saying that you're open minded then turn around and say "not my kids" when it comes to the very same issues that you claim to be so accepting of. Second, by even acknowledging these differing orientations as "out of the norm" you've already labeled them as something wrong or weird. Which would be more understandable if you DIDN'T JUST GO OFF ON A TANGENT ABOUT HOW UNACCEPTING PEOPLE ARE. :bang: And lastly, which really gets to me, to add insult by justifying your prejudice with saying that it would reflect poorly on you...I don't even know where to begin with this. You badger people for saying that sexual preference is a choice, and then you have the nerve to suggest that it is determined by one's quality of parenting. It makes me sick. I don't agree with people who are homophobic or feel that not being straight is a choice we make, but at least I can say that they have their own views on it. If you don't like something, at least own up to it. Don't go around acting like you're some kind of saint and oh so accepting when you wouldn't even accept your own child for who they are. I'm sorry for the long rant, I just really needed to vent about this. Does anyone else have this kind of problem with a loved one?
I can relate, even if from a different perspective. My mother and father haven't been really accepting of the fact that I am a trans woman yet, and among the things one of them said (my father in this case) is that he may be a bad parent for calling me a "sissy" all the time and "confusing me", lamenting like it reflects poorly on him as a parent; ugh.
My mother was all about being "LGBT-friendly", but when I came out she seemed terribly distant. The gas lighting wasn't very fun either, where she would refuse to acknowledge the fact that she was putting me down in the first place. She's like this with everyone, though, and normally seems accepting of gay people and lesbians. It might have been because I had a special connection to her, and she felt like she didn't want to lose me. It happens with parents sometimes, where they try to come up with reasons to invalidate their child's sexuality or gender preference. It's sucky, but sometimes they may be able to see the light. I suggest trying to give her a little more time, and she might warm up to you. Good luck! (*hug*)
I really feel you, this sounds really frustrating and upsetting. My parents are both accepting of LGBTQ and they don't think there is anything wrong with it but they can be a bit conservative at times. For instance, while they don't think that there is anything wrong with being bisexual they say that bisexuality is extremely rare and so if someone says they're bisexual they're probably not. For instance I told my Mum the other day about how Vogue said that Cara Delevigne's bisexuality was probably a phase and rather than being outraged, she instead said "Yeah I think it is too." When I told them I might be bisexual they said they didn't mind what my sexuality was and if I was bisexual it was fine, but that I almost definitely wasn't.
