Hi all! My boyfriend came out to me telling me he is bi. I have absolutely no problem with it. I was proud he came out because I was wondering for about 4 months why he wasn't touching me (sexually or even holding hands). Also I love him and support him. We have been together for 3 years. We always talk about the future of together and even during his talk he discussed he still wants to marry me and sees a future with me. Which is awesome and great. That night we talked about anything we could think of at that moment. However about two weeks before he came out he declared a break because he was trying to figure out what was going on with him and how he would tell me. So we are still on this break. Now I found out from a mutual friend that he is on some app called ******. During this break I have been so faithful bc even on Facebook he hasn't changed the relationship status. The problem with me is that I feel like I should say something about that him being on there, but since he just came out I also feel as if I should be cautious. Meaning I should tread lightly since he is trying to figure himself out. The only thing that he said that night he came out was that he only had an eye for guys. So if anyone can help me as to what to do (say something or wait)? We have been open for the most part but I also want to respect his feelings if that makes sense? Also what is this app ****** about? I don't want to jump to conclusions nor assume bc at first I thought it was dating app! I appreciate any advice anyone can give me! Thanks again!!
We can't say the names of apps on here for security and age awareness reasons, but I think I know the one that you're talking about even though it's ****'d out. People use it for different reasons - including friends, dating and relationships, but the majority are just after a shag. There's a fair chance that he's just on there to chat to likeminded people and to chat to people who have 'been there, done that'. You could always direct him to this forum for that kind of communication as well. If he has said that he only has eyes for guys (meaning he's probably gay, rather than bi), you might need to get used to the idea that the relationship could be over. And marrying him won't turn him straight, no matter how much you want it to. It sounds like he's going through a lot of self-exploration and discovery at the moment. Making him feel guilty or shaming him for using the internet/apps as a resource for learning more about himself will most likely hurt him quite a lot and increase his stress and insecurities about the way he is feeling. Of course you also need to look after YOURSELF. Stay close to your friends during this time that must be very difficult for you as well.
