So recently I've come to the realization that a lot of my stress stems from the fact that I'm never open with people. Whenever I have an internal problem, I never talk it through with a friend even though I need that. I just let it get bottled up inside and try to face it on my own. Being on EC has helped me be a bit more open and I want to be open with others too. So I've decided I want to try to talk to my friends more when I have problems, and ask them for support. The only problem right now is I don't really know how to go about doing it. I would feel weird and needy just asking someone if I can talk about my problems with them. I don't get to see my friends a lot outside of school, and rarely ever one on one, usually in a group so it's not super easy. I just don't know how to bring it up or to ask for help when I need it without feeling weird and bothersome. Any advice?
It's okay to feel awkward at first, but remember that the best way to overcome anxiety is to face your fears. Start small by contacting a close friend who you know gives good advice, and ask to talk with them one-on-one (in-person is best, but instant messaging can work as a bridge between meetings). If you frame your request as wanting their help with some personal problem, most people would be happy to help "problem solve". Also, it can help you if you write down what's bothering you regularly both just to have a place where you can "unload" these feelings and to give you some talking points with your friend. Also, you might consider talking to a counselor if the problems are really impacting your quality of life. Sometimes, friends/family don't have sufficient expertise on specific issues, and that's where a professional can help.
Thank you very much for the advice. I guess once I start doing that it might get easier. I do have several friends who can help me, I just need to get better at asking for help
You can try phone calling your friends. Or sending them an email. Sometimes it's easier than meeting face to face, if you're sharing your problems. Nonetheless, your friends will be there for you. It's what they're for!
