Dear all who read this, I am looking for advice regarding someone I really like. I really like them much more so than anyone else I have ever had feelings for yet I have only spoke to them in person for about 3 days then we went back to our real lives. We still chat over messenger and what not. Here is the question then, they are genderfluid and I am straight, this does not concern me in the slightest. They have told me that they sometimes like women and sometimes like men, again does not bother me. I don't know why but I have developed strong feelings for this person yet I only spent time with them in a camping site for just one weekend. We had no physical connection in a sexual way as I was married (technically I still am)-going through a divorce at the moment but it has nothing to do with the person I am seeking advice about. They have told me to not fall for someone you can never be with but I definitely felt something and whenever I look at her picture I get those high school butterflies, I know that sounds cliche but its true. They have told me things that they haven't told many others and I have told her things as well. I just need to know whether I should pursue these feelings or bury them deep down. Don't get me wrong either I do not wish for any kind of relationship until me and my current wife have gotten through the divorce. The last thing I want is to push her away or hurt her. Any advice regarding this would be most helpful thank you. Regards, Noj87
You say that you don't want to do anything until the divorce is over, so it sounds like the best course of action is to just continue where you are--as friends--until that happens. Then, if you're still interested in pursuing a relationship with them, tell them how you feel and see what happens. Best of luck.
You seem like a very cool guy, very respectful of your soon-to-be ex-wife as well as of the feelings of the person you currently love and of her genderfluidity, that's awesome and they are both very lucky ! Like Aspen said I don't think you should bury those feelings as they seem genuine and you seem willing to wait until your divorce to pursue them, so I would definitely say ' go for it!' and hope it brings you luck.
I can tell you from experience, burying feelings never works. I think you should take things at a slow pace, but you should definitely let them know how you feel. After you've divorced, that is. Hope all goes smoothly.
