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Will this help me get over my insecurities?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by sporn, Sep 13, 2015.

  1. sporn

    sporn Guest

    I've been insecure about my sexuality. Mainly because of bad coming out experiences. No one believed me. I'm still constantly doubting my sexuality. I've been wanting to date girls for a while. Mainly to prove my sexuality and get more experience. I also want to change my appearance to look more alternative so people will stop doubting my sexuality. Will people see my insecurities and not want to date me?
     
  2. mangotree

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    If someone likes you for who you are deep down, they'll accept - or at the very least - tolerate your insecurities.
    If they don't, then they're probably not the kinds of people you want to be around for long periods of time.

    With regards to experimenting in order to learn more about yourself, best to just be completely honest with people from the get-go.
     
  3. Linus

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    Looks shouldn't matter, or change your sexuality. Don't feel the need to conform to stereotypes or... Roles. If you like girls, you like girls. The only way to prove that is by liking girls. Other's opinions... Well I don't know how much they matter to you... But point is, they don't NEED to matter.
     
  4. Lin1

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    There is few worrying things in your post and it's the need you have to prove who you are to others. Why ? Why put so much pressure on your shoulders and so much effort for people who obviously don't deserve the time and attention you want to give them.


    Some people have questioned and doubted my bisexuality, but guess what ? Those people weren't worth my time and the trouble of proving them wrong. I know who I am and I know I like girls as much as I like guys and I do not want to have to prove it to them and you shouldn't either. There is no proof needed of your bisexuality or lesbianity, you do not need and do not have to prove anything to anyone but yourself. You know you like girls and want to date them and that's enough proof that you aren't straight.
    Experimenting is fine but it has to be because you want to, not to make a point. Using someone to prove your sexuality can be extremely hurtful and damaging to the person you plan on experimenting with. About changing your style is fine too but it also has to be something you want for yourself and not because you want to fit the 'lesbian stereotype(s)' that are out there.

    Personally I would notice immediately if someone was putting on an act for other people and wasn't comfortable in their own skin and in who they are and I would find it a huge turn off. I want my girlfriend to be confident in who she is and not fear what people think of her, I want her to be fine with people not believing she is into girls because deep down she knows who she is and what she likes and what other people think of it or her doesn't matter, that's the kind of girl I want to date.

    I am not saying people would not date you if you were getting another haircut and doing the things you mentioned just that I find it so much more attractive when a girl is being herself and is confident in her own skin. If that requires a new haircut for you then go for it, but if not then don't. You really don't have to please anyone but yourself.

    Hugs to you OP ! (*hug*)