Hey everyone, I just need some advice to move on, but here's the story with my romance. I had my very first experience of dating. Sorta. The girl I am really into actually liked me back and she just came out of a recent very serious relationship (2 months ago). So, anyways, she wanted to eventually be in a relationship with me, she tells me. We casually hung out with each other and friends. I had my first kiss with her and making out. She showed me an exciting world of being in college (as I am a studious person, I never go out). During these weeks of fun, she would show so much interest in me. Saying stuff like, "wow I really like you, D" or "you're so beautiful D. I'm always looking at you and your smile melts my heart" or "I am into you so fucking much" or "I think about you a lot D" or she'd always miss me and say "I wish you were here." However as the weeks pass and I spilled to her that my family is close-minded/I'm in the closet, she just decides that it's a bad idea for us to be together. It must have been a deal breaker for her - these things about me. The more she learned how close-minded my family was, she just didn't want to deal with it. Or so that's what I assumed. She never gave me a real reason beside the fact that she "didn't want things to get too serious" but that's honestly BS. It was HER that wanted a relationship with me from the start, she started it. The fact that she told me when she ended it "I think you're beautiful and fantastic and wonderful but I just couldn't cling onto you in a way" and I knew that that meant me being in the closet and my family life was too complicated to handle and it held her back. Not only that she also broke up with her ex, so she has all the more reason for wanting casual encounterments and no commitment. I can completely understand for her not to be into me because I'm in the closet with my parents, and out to majority of my friends. I knew it bothered her. My family life and my lifestyle. But, I really do like this girl. And I wish we could've had this thing going on longer. It was my first dating experience and I loved how casual and lighthearted everything was. I wish it could've meant a lot more to her, too. But I guess I'm just a fool for trying to open up to her - I was too excited and nervous around her that I said too many things about my family. She was someone so wonderful, but I guess it isn't worth it for her to keep pursuing this with me. I wasn't particularly looking for anything serious either, but she just ended it, saying: "I think we could do so much better as friends." So, that must be it. The first real unrequited attraction to a person who doesn't want any of me. It was so nice to finally kiss a girl. It was perfect. And I'll always remember it. How can I get over someone who isn't into you? Can I prevent the awkwardness when she finds another girl? This girl lives on campus and she's the same major as me so there's a high chance I will run into her... So I just don't want to get hurt when I see her, and stuff. Do I just laugh things off and pretend to be friends?
