Sorry, you probably get these posts a lot but I honestly wasn't sure who to ask since none of my friends are gay/les/bi. Basically, I'm Bisexual, and recently came out to all my friends. They were all super supportive so don't worry about that Basically there's this girl who I'm sort of friends with. Last year we had most of our classes together and sometimes we'd talk but we're both kind of shy so it wasn't very frequent. This year were in even less classes, but we're allowed to talk freely in the one-two classes we have together. So I really really like her, she's gorgeous and kind and funny and were so compatible and I'd love to date her but I don't know if she's straight or not. (Warning this might be offensive to some people): We're both rather feminine so it's really hard to tell if either of us are gay. As I said I'm out to my friends but not to everyone around me so she has no idea I'm bi. So this is where it might be offensive. You see all the videos on YouTube talking about (jokingly) how to tell if a girl isn't straight, such as short nails, lots of flannels, etc. We both meet that criteria, you'll find us on flannels a few times every week or two, and both our nails are always short. Other than that neither of us has any tells that would let others know we're queer. The whole problem is idk if she's gay or not. I remember when gay marriage became legal in all 50 states she posted it all over Twitter and was retweeting things about it and none of my straight friends even mentioned it let alone post it on social media. At this point to me it's 50-50 on whether or not she's straight or queer. I was really hoping I could get some advice or views from a third party, it would reply help. Thanks! Edit: She's always the one to initiate conversations since I'm super shy around people I have a crush on. Recently she said hi to me and we started conversing from there. It was the longest we had ever really talked and as I said, she approached me not the other way around. And I can't come out to her because we've only had a few conversations and it'd be weird to be like "Hey I'm bi, anyways how was your day?" If we become better friends I'll definitely tell her in hopes of her saying something like "oh me too", but we definitely aren't there yet so please don't recommend I tell her I just really wanna know if I'm falling for a straight girl or if I have a chance.
Honestly, what you're going through is EXACTLY what I went through. I fell for my best friend 9 months ago.. and haha I didn't know if she was straight or not. And she didn't know I was gay when I came out to my friends. She showed a lot of hints and I crushed on her for more than 9 months. I told her that I was gay a month ago and she was perfectly fine with it and now she's always asking me questions and so curious about it. But I found out that she's straight as well (a month ago too). And then.. I thought about it. Is it really worth it? So I kinda forgot my feelings but they come back sometimes. But hey... don't give up. You never know what's gonna happen. Do you see any hints? Does she get close with you? Being feminine, well, of course, doesn't determine if you're gay or not. I mean, I'm tomboyish (a little feminine too) and my BFF is feminine so.. nvm, that was irrelevant XD Anyway, you can observe the way she acts around you and with her friends and other people. Does she act differently with you than with others? Does she grab your hand in a way? Actions speak so much louder than words and it might prove something. Since she doesn't know that you're bi, maybe you can just talk about with your other friends or other people when she's around? Maybe she'll get a hint from it and be like 'Oh, she's bi?' Or, you can bring it up during a conversation and you guys can ask each other questions? But remember, if she's straight or not, there's always a chance. You never know what's gonna happen, so don't bring yourself down. Right now, I'm pushing my feelings aside and I'm gonna see what happens. If my BFF shows more hints or interest, I'll see if it's worth it. After all, nothing's impossible. Wish you the best of luck and I hoped I helped. ^-^ (*hug*)
Hanks for the advice as I said we aren't really like close friends, we're only starting to become friends now and I know for a fact neither of us are outgoing enough to move so quickly and start hugging eachother or making advances. We're both shy, and if she hadn't said anything to me recently I probably would have just admired her from afar for the rest of my life and not said a single world to her because I'm so shy around people who I really like. And she's not my best friend (yet ) so as I said, we don't have that closeness that best friends have, if she made a grab for me I'd be alarmed and really fucking confused lmao. Like we're more so aquaintinces than friends but we're starting to become friends. Like we say hi to eachother in the hallway and what not now. Literally the only hints I have to go off of is that she approached me multiple times when she really doesn't approach other people to talk to them, as far as I know at least. Like she'd never reach out to anyone she didn't know other than myself. So it's like she put extra effort into me more so than anyone else, but that could just be me hoping and wishing haha.
No problem, it's a pleasure. ^_^ And ah, I see. That's understandable, just take a long time to know her as a person and become best friends. And lol, actions are super weird. :roflmao: Well, I hope you two will get closer and I hope good things will come. ^_^ And mentioning that she puts extra effort into you instead of others might mean that she's interested in knowing you so put up your game. :icon_wink :roflmao: You get me xD But I hope all goes well with you two. ^_^
Thanks so much and yes since I've started talking to her I've been going to the gym and working on my ass and abs so when we're changing for gym I can show her my nice ass haha. I'm literally wearing nicer clothes tomorrow just so when I say hi to her in the hallway I'll look nicer. It's kinda sad but oh well. I'd to anything for her tbh
Np! And damn! XD lol I would do the same but I'm lazy now xD But yee, show her some ass :roflmao: And that's nice! And why sad?!
Well I've never been so head over heels for someone so this whole "love" thing is kind of new to me so I feel weird talking about how much I like her when she doesn't even know I'm bi and crushing on her hard core.
Same here. And awh hehe. c: I feel you so much But hey, it feels really amazing so don't let it drift away. After all, I think hard core crushing is the best. :icon_bigg
Like only recently I've accepted being queer and it feels amazing not feeling bad about checking girls out or fantasizing about them, so it's totally new territory for me to even pursue a girl. It would be easier if we saw eachother more often but other than in the hallway I only see her 2 times a week at most. Sometimes even less or not at all for a variety of personal issues with the class (idk it's complicated). It'd be much easier if it was like last year and we were in almost every class together
That's so great! It does feel amazing and like a whole new world. ^_^ But you'll get used to it completely soon. and that sucks Twice a week? That's not enough ;-; I hope you guys can maybe find a way to see eachother more? Maybe join a club together?
I[/QUOTE] That's so great! It does feel amazing and like a whole new world. ^_^ But you'll get used to it completely soon. and that sucks Twice a week? That's not enough ;-; I hope you guys can maybe find a way to see eachother more? Maybe join a club together?[/QUOTE] Yeah it's a class that only happens every few days and she has health issues so she usually doesn't even attend. I'd love to join a club with her in it but I don't think she is in any clubs and I'm im one but I don't think she'd join. Once we become better friends I'll probably harass her until she joins but that's a good tip God knows what I'll do, for now I'm just trying to make sure I don't talk myself out of saying hey to her in the hallway lmao. Thanks for your help
That's so great! It does feel amazing and like a whole new world. ^_^ But you'll get used to it completely soon. and that sucks Twice a week? That's not enough ;-; I hope you guys can maybe find a way to see eachother more? Maybe join a club together?[/QUOTE] Yeah it's a class that only happens every few days and she has health issues so she usually doesn't even attend. I'd love to join a club with her in it but I don't think she is in any clubs and I'm im one but I don't think she'd join. Once we become better friends I'll probably harass her until she joins but that's a good tip God knows what I'll do, for now I'm just trying to make sure I don't talk myself out of saying hey to her in the hallway lmao. Thanks for your help [/QUOTE] Oh that's awesome! And awh.. Poor her.. Well, I wish you luck and hehe, no, you'll be okay. Just breathe in and out and it'll be alright. (*hug*) And no problem. ^^
