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Falling in love again (great)

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by MerBear, Oct 6, 2015.

  1. MerBear

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    Okay, so my depression has finally eased off which is good because I was really suicidal,and I didn't know if I was going to make it or not.

    Anyway now it's just, another one of those unfortunate falling in love with someone you can't have situations, I'm surprised I haven't gotten use to it now.

    This girl Jillian I know, I'm falling for her deeply, and in the beginning, she did like me and everything, but told me after we kissed and everything that she wasn't ready for a relationship, but the problem is whenever we see each other, we both end up kissing each other, and cuddling, or hold hands. I've gotten mad at the fact, she's kissed me knowing my feelings for her weren't being helped, but at the same time... It's hard not to want to kiss her too. I can't help but look at her, and just have everything fall into place. She has some PTSD stuff going on, and I respect that completely and am supporting her through everything she goes through, it's just hard being so close knowing your falling so hard for a girl who's not wanting to be in a relationship, and it's not that I don't understand, I do. I wasn't ready for a relationship either for awhile but nevertheless, I guess I'm asking...

    How do I soften my fall? because I can't leave her... Last time I tried to leave to save myself from further heartbreak and I ended up crying for 3 days straight, and eventually coming back... I would try to not kiss her, but when we are together, the tension is so thick between us that it just happens naturally...
     
  2. Truna

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    If she's kissed you, cuddled you, and held hands with you while knowing that you love her, then it may just be the label of a relationship that's stressing her out. She will most likely come around though.

    Good luck to you, please keep us posted!
     
  3. MerBear

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    I think maybe you're right, i don't know, Just gets frustrating when you're falling for someone I suppose
     
  4. STM29

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    I do agree on this.

    I know this kind of behavior from some friends. They were kinda in a relationship and behaved like that, but they didn't feel comfortable with calling it relationship. They even had a commitment about being exclusive and so. Both were happy and enjoyed being together, but one of them just felt uncomfortable with labeling it.

    So have you two a great time when you're together? Are you enjoying being with each other?
    Then just let it be this way. Don't stress her out with labeling it.
    Ofc there is the possibility that it won't become a relationship and that she breaks it up. But chances are quite good that she feels fine with being with you but just don't calling it relationship for now. Give her some time, be patient and see what the future will bring.

    Good luck! :slight_smile:
     
  5. MerBear

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    Yeah I don't know, I just asked her out long ago and she said she's not ready for one. But as I've said whenever I come over, she'll say "are you comfortable if I kiss you?" And we always cuddle and she always says that I make her feel safe. I know the label is stressful, I'm not going to ask her again, I'm just scared she'll find someone better and call them her's one day. We don't see each other often. Maybe every 2 weeks. Depending on if we are busy. I'll keep you guys updated though, thank you much for your advice.