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First time relationship... with a girl whose mother is biphobic

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by sailingonwards, Oct 11, 2015.

  1. sailingonwards

    Regular Member

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    Spring 2014, I became friends with this girl, a couple months later she came out to me as bisexual, and she then became the first person I came out to. We live about an hour away from each other, and I usually only see her once or twice a month because of sports.

    We were going to go to homecoming together last year (I wasn't sure what our relationship was at that point, but I definitely liked her, and looking back at old texts it was totally mutual and I was just clueless) but her mom said no because "we're both girls." (The girl's words, not her mom's, as far as I know.) We kind of drifted apart after that. (Side note that I crushed hard last spring on one of her best friends who is also bisexual. But that faded into just platonic attraction after a while.) Hadn't talked in nearly a year when I saw her again at the beginning of the school year, and it was like nothing had changed between us.

    Yesterday, she asked me to homecoming. I can't go because of logistical challenges but I told her I would have gone if I could. Unfortunately, this happens a lot because I'm a pretty busy person, and my parents won't drive me to where she lives because it takes a while and gas costs a significant amount. (Someone already suggested asking her on a date closer to my house; I'll probably do that.)

    I came out two weeks ago. I don't know how out she is, but she says I can tell people that we're dating. A friend of mine already asked me if she and I were a thing (and it'd been less than 24 hours since)! I just can't tell her mom, who apparently still doesn't fully accept bisexuality. She thinks her mom will eventually be fine with it, but I expect that that will take a while.

    Are there any do's and don'ts here? Any advice would be very welcome since this is my first relationship. :eek:
     
  2. lucky28

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    Just take things slow. My relationship was ruined by rushing just about everything, especially since it was a first same-sex relationship we had. Also remember that it is your first relationship, and that anything can happen, and not to dwell on it. First relationships can be the best time of your life, but it's a double edged sword, definitely. For every great moment, there can either be a bad one or make everything hurt more if things don't work.

    I really hope I'm not depressing you!!! Like I said, first relationships are great, and you have to start somewhere!! And around her mother, if that situation ever arises, just be yourself, but be respectful. I'm sure your girlfriend would appreciate that too!! All the best!!

    Lovingly,
    Jacob
     
    #2 lucky28, Oct 11, 2015
    Last edited: Oct 11, 2015
  3. sailingonwards

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    Thanks!! I need all the help I can get haha, awkward gay kid problems I guess?
     
  4. lucky28

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    Haha yeah :icon_bigg honestly wouldn't have it any other way for me!