I need somewhere to rant and vent and get some help from anyone out there because I'm concerned and its been bottled up for ages. Basically I feel like i have the worst luck in relationships to point where i feel like I'm cursed and punished for no reason. I am the most nicest honest trustworthy person you would ever meet. I'm always the one who will make sure it works. Im loyal and would never cheat on anyone. I do things for people i probably wouldn't do for my family. If we argue we work it out not run off and swear at each other. Thats how i work. But I just seem to never get in a relationship. I get heaps of dates which last for months on end, but the other person always says they are not ready, or they are using dating apps behind my back and i get upset, but usually bottle this up. Its not fair because i know heaps of other people who get in relationships where one person is rude and obnoxious and their partner is head over heels for them and will do anything to keep them. For example my cousin is in a relationship and she is always rude and obnoxious to her partner. She expects to be treated like a princess and she always fights with him, but he always does everything for her and does everything to make her happy, they are even getting engaged! She even cheated on him on her holiday with someone else and he doesn't even know about it. Why isn't she cursed? Since witnessing things like this, i feel nothing but cursed and have been slapped with bad luck. Every person i meet likes me and dates me for a long long time and then turn around and change their mind which makes me feel mislead. Theres nothing wrong with me as I've had a girlfriend for 8 years and now I'm praying and wishing i never broke up with her. To me i feel as though with a girl, if you love her respect her she will do anything to keep you, but guys....i don't even wanna go there! Its like even if you gave them the world they still would never appreciate anything you do for them Im on the verge of giving up and since I'm not out to anyone, my parents have arranged a girl for me and to be honest i think ill go ahead and stay with girls. Yeah its wrong and evil, but i want something stable not something to worry about.
Is part of the problem maybe that your not out to anyone? That could be a massive factor in limiting your success.
This was my gut reaction too. While I would hang out with or be friends with someone who wasn't out, I honestly wouldn't consider a serious relationship with someone who was still closeted especially if things dragged on and it became apparent that that wasn't going to change.
Two extra thoughts - try to avoid the comparison game. You mention your cousin, who's in a relationship and doesn't seem to be having any bad luck despite cheating and lots of arguing. But, flip it around - would you like to be the guy she's with, not knowing what is happening in the relationship? Or, would you even want to be in her shoes, dating someone but arguing with them and cheating on them? Past the initial phase of "they have somebody in their lives," it may not be as rosy as you'd suspect at first glance. It's also okay to take some time off from dating. As counter-intuitive as that may sound, a chance to get yourself more comfortable with other parts of your life, more interested in other things, and more able to come back to dating with a fresh perspective could help a lot. Do want to echo prior comments about possibly not being out, though. What kinds of thoughts are you having about orientation, etc?
Thats the thing. Im not ready to come out, but also if i come out i have to be in a serious relationship first. Ive always communicated this. ---------- Post added 14th Oct 2015 at 05:11 AM ---------- I understand. I guess I'm just angry that people are just lucky in life thats all
