My girlfriend and I have been friends for a little over 10 years. We have started dating and everything is fairly ok for the most part except something I have had a major issue with here lately. She works as a security guard at a computer place and this guy works at the computer place. They are employed by separate companies. Well supposedly he went snooping on her LinkedIn account and found her phone number and has been texting for a about a week now. Well the text have gotten pretty late and she is a night owl anyways. I just find it weird and uncomfortable that someone supposedly cant sleep but is married feels its right to text my girlfriend who knows she is dating someone. We have discussed and she assures me nothing is going on but I don't feel ok and I do trust her i don't trust other peoples intentions. I find it disrespectful to text someone at 2 am and you know there with their girlfriend and you should be with you wife. I want to make sure I am not blowing it out of proportion I would love feedback on this situation and perhaps what I should do next.
You all should go on a double date haha I'm not trying to be funny. I am being serious. It's what I would do. I don't think you're blowing it out of proportion. I think the mystery of this guy and his intentions is what has you feeling uneasy. I would be a little uneasy as well considering how he went out of his way to get her phone number. BUT I would trust my girlfriend. How long have they been working together? How much do you know about this guy? Maybe they have a lot in common. I would feel a little better knowing he's married. Do they work the night shift? It would make sense that they talk so late if they do. You can't worry about other people so much. Trust your girlfriend.
I think it's one of those occassions where you need to put your trust in your girlfriend. You have spoken to her and she has assured you that nothing is going on, so you must have confidence in her word. If you appear to be suspicious without good cause or justification it could damage your relationship with her. I don't think it would be unreasonable to ask your girlfriend to not reply to his texts so late if it's disruptive. I'd be rather pissed off if text notifications were coming through in the middle of the night too and I'm sure he's only doing it because he is receiving a response.
It's incredibly inappropriate for this married guy (or even a single guy) to be texting a girl at 2am who is in a relationship. If I were your girlfriend, I'd be telling him to beat it. But it's possible she likes the attention. Perhaps you could gently talk to her about t, say both that it's inappropriate and that it makes you feel a little uncomfortable.
She has spoken of him evidently he is sarcastic and they connect on that level. He is married according to my girlfriend. Which she always gives people the benefit of the doubt. She has assured me that nothing is going on and that if something crosses a line she would tell me and she will cut it off and handle it accordingly.
Did that make you feel any better? You say things like "evidently'' and ''according to'' so I guess you really think something is up with this guy, huh? If they are becoming good friends, there's nothing wrong with that. That's why I say I would be like ''well, lets all go to dinner or something. I'd like to meet him and his wife.'' They could be a really cute couple or something. Get the mystery out of the equation, you know? If all they ever do is just text, I think that's weird considering he's married and she's committed to you. Does she stay up late to text him or is she just up in general? There's a difference. I agree with Patrick. I would be irked too if the texts were disruptive. I don't agree with how he got her number. I don't like that. I wouldn't like that if I were you. This should have all started with ''hey, why don't you and your gf go to dinner with me and my wife. I've enjoyed working with you."
First of all you need to talk to her. Tell her exactly what do you feel and that this situation is uncomfortable for you. And you need to trust her after all. You don't need to trust other people or this guy, you just need to trust her Ps: Maybe this double date isn't bad idea huh?
