I really really want to tell them I'm not straight, but the thing is it's highly unlikely they'll support me. They are very religious, and up to about a year ago they would always voice their disgust of same-sex couples, once telling me it wasn't allowed in this house when my Sister said it's okay if I like girls (since I currently conform to the female gender) since she was trying to get me to say if I liked someone. But recently this year I feel like they think there's a chance I am not straight (which would be correct), and often avoid bringing up relationships/crushes/boys around me. They actually now when something about LGBT+ comes on in the news are silent and don't voice a disgust for it which is a lot different than before, considering they went as far as to call it "inhumane". But the fact my Parents said it isn't allowed in our house about two years ago still bugs me, and I feel like they wouldn't go back on it completely. Specially since they're really religious, and not a single person in our Family has come out as queer, and I would be the first out of 15 cousins and two siblings. My Parents have called me out on distancing myself from them. Which I've been doing to try and isolate my feelings if in the future when I tell them and they don't accept me that I can at the very least not feel to much of a blow to the heart. But in the end I just want them to love me without feeling like a liar. Does anyone have any advice? Maybe gone through something a bit like this? I honestly kind of just needed to get my thoughts and feelings down :icon_redf
The fact that they're making an effort not to say anything bad about LGBT+ issues if they suspect you're not straight is a start, since they're trying to be sensitive of that. But based on how they were before, I think they'd still probably have a hard time with it and I would be cautious if I were you. It's not fair of them to make you feel like you should come out/be open with them if the only thing they're doing is "not saying mean things when LGBT+ stuff comes up on tv". They should show they support you, or else they can't expect you not to distance yourself from them (assuming they have suspicions). I don't know how old you are, but at this point I think it may be a good idea to wait some more, see how they are. It's better that you be safe about it because it wouldn't be good for you to come out if it could be at all unsafe for you - physically or emotionally. And in that case, you might want to consider coming out only after you live on your own/support yourself because your own well-being is most important. You don't owe them any confessions if they're not going to try and give you their full support and I think they're being pretty cryptic about that. I know you want to be honest with them, but this is something where it would probably be best for you to not say it to them, at least not yet. Best wishes<3
