Have any of you ever felt almost angry because queer people are often surrounded in a world in which everyone else takes everything for granted. I'm talking about the ability for straight people to find romantic compatibility with the opposite sex so easily. I hate feeling this way, but I envy the lives of so many others. I am 19 and I have never had my first kiss or dated anyone before, just for the simple fact that I do not know any other queer females that are single or even desirable. The dating pool is sooo small and it makes me worry that I will forever live a lonely life. Am I alone in this?
In more judgmental areas where everyone is closeted, it's ridiculous. I am a bit jealous of the enormous dating pool, but at the same time I'm kind of glad I'm not into straight guys because of the way so many of them act. I was able to date in this area only once, because someone was bi-curious, and she turned out straight. So the frustration is there, haha.
I hate to hear your frustration, but I am glad that I can relate. I noticed that you are from the south....for that I am sorry lol; I am from Mississippi.
Of course. I always looking at girls and thinking, "wouldn't it be so easy to be straight?" I've even tried to imagine what sex would be like with a girl, and I'm always repulsed. However, don't give up hope. If you're in a place where the gay population is extremely low, there's really nothing you can do except bide your time and move when you're able to. Or you could rely on online dating for a little bit. It's not as bad as people think, so long as you do your own personal filtering. I had my first kiss and sexual experience this year, and I'm 22. You can bet that at 19 I was feeling exactly the same way you did.
Being in the closet still, I do get jealous at how certain people can air their feelings out in the open easier than me, but I cheer myself by thinking that, "the" person meant for me would be extra special, being the one standing out in a crowd than being part of one. Cheesy. I know. But it works for me.
I resent that in certain places and around certain people, I have to tone down my affection when I'm with my girlfriend if we don't want to get stared at or given dirty looks.
