I found my dad's Sunday school lesson on homosexuality... it went on forever packed full of hate towards the lgbt community. It painted us as villains trying to persecute Christians. It was like a doomsday speech. Little does he know both his daughters are bisexual. I cried for about an hour after reading it, feeling like shit. The worst part is it came from my dad. I love my family so much, but it's so hard when they think this way. I feel tremendous guilt even though it's not my fault. I keep telling myself I could just focus on my attraction to guys and ignore my sexual orientation and pretend to be straight forever, but that's not who I am and I feel guilty. I will never come out to them. I also feel tremendous guilt due to my religion and I want to believe it's possible to be a gay christian, but it's clear what's written in the bible. Why am I so guilty for something I can't change and didn't cause?
I would check out the Gay Christian Network Website. They provide lots of great resources for Gay Christians, including scriptural arguments for why it isn't a sin to be gay. Also, remember that Jesus loves you. He loves you so much that he gave his life so that you, Loftymouse, could be with Him forever. Do you really think that he would let your sexual orientation (which he gave you, by the way) get in the way of that? Your dad and your church sound like they're forgetting the gospel and are getting stuck on dogma. As the apostle Paul says in Romans 8:39, "No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord." So yes, you can be a gay christian: even if it is a sin, Jesus loves you too much. As for what to do about your family, it may be easier to forget the gay half of your bisexuality and pretend to be straight until you're in a safer position. If you go to college in a more liberal part of the country, that could be a good time to be more open about your sexual orientation. I'm not as familiar with your situation as you are, but from what I can gather, coming out to your father may put you in danger. Always keep praying!
I'm really sorry that you found so much hate and intolerance in your Dad's Sunday school lesson. It always disappoints me when Christian people take such a negative approach, because that too is contrary to Biblical teaching. Jesus had a lot to say about people judging each other. I agree with the previous poster. It really isn't the case the Bible is clear about homosexuality at all. In none of the four gospels did Jesus say that same sex attraction is wrong/sinful and it doesn't actually say that anywhere else in the Bible actually. Even the often quoted passage from Leviticus isn't to be taken literally. Do check out the Gay Christian Network and other affirming resources for gay Christians. There is a lot out there and it would be a shame if you fell into the trap of thinking that the entire Christian Church is against LGBT people. For every passage that is quoted against homosexuality there is a simple explanation and hundreds more that could be taken as affirmative. It's very hard when someone you love upsets you so much, but please don't try to suppress who you really are because no good will come of that.
