Feel kinda awkward coming to the internet for advice but would like a varied perspective. So I’m 22 year old guy and I recently met this guy through not-so-conventional means. For the first time, I met him at his house and we had what they call “fun without the finish” and it was enjoyable. The following day he wanted to meet up again however we went for a walk first where there were a couple of moments when he held my hand or put his arm around me (not sure whether my cynical nature would treat that as ‘tactical’) before we went to a restaurant. It was a little bit awkward as the conversation was not really flowing. I put it down to both of us being nervous and that a restaurant environment is admittedly intense. We ended up at his place again for another round of “fun without the finish” and it was again, enjoyable. We texted after I left and the day after which was great because I quite like him and I rarely have the opportunity to meet a guy who’s on my level and easy to be around. Third day in a row he text me and asked if I wanted to hang out and I replied with yes but “where do you want to go”? to hint that we should do something other than taking our clothes off. He responded and said cinema which I thought was good but then he said “or we could just chill?” much to my dismay. I then suggested bringing films round to watch at his and we did, got a pizza and just had a good time. We went out for a walk and there were several moments again when he held my hand (I’m not really a public display of affection kinda guy but it was kinda sweet) [again, not sure if it was ‘tactical’] The only problem is that I can see myself developing feelings and wanting to take things further (relationship wise) but want to make sure I don’t rush into anything and that he wants the same thing – I’m sort of getting the feeling that he doesn’t (considering we end up at his) but then I get confused when we do date-like things? He pays me a lot of compliments which I don’t take greatly as I never believe anyone who tells me I’m ‘nice’ or ‘good looking’ and again, I don’t want my insecurity of feeling like he could do so much better to manifest itself in my behaviours. I’ve sent him a text and he’s not responding as of yet so I’m wondering whether he’s had his fill of me or I’m overthinking it and need a reality check (my insecurity leads me to both of those answers) I want us to continue hanging around, more so without the sexual activity. On occasion it will be nice but how do I find out if he’s only after the sex or if he wants something more without moving too fast or too slow? I’ve invited him to do things like going to Winter Wonderland or bowling, someplace neutral and he seems up for it but whether he will anticipate wanting to end up at his – obviously that can be easily remedied by not ending up at his but whether that will comes across like I’m not interested? I’d much rather find out what he wants now than later down the line when I’ve developed feelings for him. But then I wonder whether it’s too soon to assess “where we are”? I like having certainty and unfortunately this is something you have to take a risk on and take it a steady pace but should I carry on only to find he wants regularly booty calls or is the benefit of it developing into something more far greater than the risk being someone’s hotline bling. I basically want to go out with him where we cannot end up back at his, so that he knows I'm interested but not just interested in seeing him naked. (And yes, I know it's all my fault anyway) If there’s anything you’re unsure of or want more detail as I haven’t included every aspect/detail, let me know and I’ll try to clarify – sometimes I feel like I’m explaining myself fully (because it’s all in my head) but it ends up not making sense!
