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My sister is stuck in trainwreck relationship.

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by Hina, Dec 1, 2015.

  1. Hina

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    Well my older sister has isolated herself in an antisocial situation by moving to an environment that is totally out of her element and of any family and friends support. She bought 40 acres of land in the middle of nowhere in Oregon of her gf choosing where the only social interaction she has is with her work mates or with her gf and her gf's family. She pretty much lives in rural farm country. Her gf have some huge baggage. She has 2 kids, unemployed and mood swings and a genetic disorder that causes back problems as she age. And she has a lurking ex-husband that is always nearby. Also her gf’s parents hate my sister just because she is more successful or her gf said. Also my sister is the first female she ever had a relationship with. I do I know if is even a lesbian?

    In the beginning I was proud of my sister to want to live in a more natural and self-sustain do it yourself life since she was never that kind of person. I was also happy she found someone who cares about her but the more and more I got to know her so call one true love the more I noticed her lover is a total train wreck. Our family actually accepted my sister’s gf lack of employment, having 2 kids and her health issue but what broke the straw was that she is rude and disrespectful and thinks she owns my sister and her land.

    She charged out screaming and yelling due to the fact my mom and I was talking in our own language and she thought it's about us talking shit about her and her kids. She has some insecurity problem. Well my mom doesn't speak English and never said anything bad about her kids. My mom said they were good kids. My mom even tried to buy gifts for Christmas of the kids choosing but my sister's gf bitch to my sister that she should choose what to buy and make it a surprise. Well my mom gave my sister a $100 but they said they lost $50 just because they dropped the money when we tried to call them. We only called because her kids wanted to know where she is at. Also when my mom wanted to buy the kids lunch my sister's gf insist on paying for her kids than few minutes later she bitched at my sister so my sister bitched at my mom for the money back. All this over an $8 plate of food that the kids shared.

    Obviously my mom will talk to me about how displease she was but it doesn't give my sister's gf the right to charge in yelling and screaming just because she doesn't know a foreign language. I had to calm this crazy Hillbilly down just because of her own ignorance. I had to tell her that it could be a misunderstanding because of a language barrier and my sister isn't the best person to communicate with my mom.

    My sister doesn't understand that talking with our parents is like dealing with a cultural shock and from another generation, not everything my mom says is PC America. Truth be told my mom is actually more understanding and accepting than most people her age no matter what culture or ethnic background. My mom actually tried to accept my sister's train wreck of a gf way before the tantrums knowing fully her background.

    Next day her gf charged out naked in front of me and my mom just because I told my sister to learn to communicate with mom and not make mom upset and stop making me the third wheel. Her gf said that I was belittling my sister and I lack compassion and that I was too young and lack experience. What does age have to do with anything? Just because she is way older than me and my sister doesn't mean she is wiser.

    Crazy, was justifying that me talking to my sister had something to do with her just because she is fucking my sister and said that she makes my sister happy and we don't. What is worst is this crazy bitch is naked in front of my mom and has no respect for personal space and actually grabbed my shirt and threw immature insults. I literally told them just calmly seat and talk and she insulted by saying I was "playing the good daughter". (Literally her own words). My sister also said I should stop trying to be diplomatic since it's beyond that since I hurt their feelings. Fuck their crazy mood swings and feeling. Her gf said we should be grateful to visit them and appreciate them and have some compassion for them. How could anyone appreciate this insanity? How could anyone have compassion when they don’t even understand what compassion is? If my sister wasn't so in love with her I would had beat her up even if she is a 6ft giant cow with genetic disorder. She said she is a brawler and yet she hide in the room when I want to tell her the truth.

    I wish my sister know that she could do so much better. She is a UC Berkeley graduates with a banker job and dual citizenships and owns a house and land and she is only 31 and her hillbilly gf failed high school and is middle age and preach about being independent when she relies on government support, to child support and her father support. Yes be delusional be proud of all the hand outs. Yes she bitch and moan about why her ex-husband haven't deposit his checks so she could go Black Friday shopping. She doesn't even have beauty or health or even youth or a sweet personality to fall back on. She can't even appreciate kindness and acceptance from other especially to her children. What a shitty mom to call her own kids shitty and just because we said they were good and smart kids. Well we pity her kids. Her kids deserve better. At least her kids are independent for their age and actually wants to go to college. They aren't even in high school yet.

    I doubt she is even a lesbian when my sister is the only female she had a relationship with. No decent person can accept all the baggage and mood swings. If the person have a good personality it's acceptable if they are flawed but this was so unacceptable. My sister only accepted her baggage because the fear of being alone and assume no one will loves her for who she is. Also being isolated in the middle of nowhere in a rural land will make it harder for her to find someone else. I wish my sister knows that her family loves her for who she is but she always thinks she is unloved just because she is different. She doesn't think me being bisexual counts as understanding as well. My sister need to learn to accept her blood family instead of expecting us need to accept her every whim to prove our love to her.

    I hate it when her gf gives this bitchy tone to my sister and my sister just takes it. I wished my sister back talk her hillbilly gf like she back talk us. My sister shouldn't have lashed out at me or mom at random as well just because she can't tell her gf to take a chill pill and stop whining. My sister needs to learn to express her feelings and not be so afraid of her low life of a gf.

    I hate how fake my sister have become and is emotionally attach to this psycho. "Yes, babe!" "Ok Babe." "I'll do it, Babe." I wish she would just move to a city with a larger lesbian community and see there are plenty fishes out there who will accept her for her. At least someone with a more stable mentality.
     
  2. Distant Echo

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    Ok. You lost me at hillbilly and the comment about whether your sister's gf is a lesbian.
    You don't like your sister's gf, or the relationship. Ok. But it appears your sister does, and she's the one who needs to be happy. What she chooses to do with her life is up to her, and you putting down her gf because you don't think she is good enough is not the way to go.

    Calm down.
     
  3. Hina

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    I didn't put her GF down in the beginning. I start putting her down after she disrespected my mother by charging out naked screaming and yell without fully understanding the situation.

    It started out my sister random lash out at my mom or me. It always happen every time her GF lash out at her.
     
  4. Hina

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    Truth be told I worry about my sister is being used since I also found out my gf's ex-husband visit her in my sister property when my sister was at work, and my sister bought life insurance making her GF the benefactor if she dies.

    It will make anyone question if she is just playing with my sister's heart.
     
    #4 Hina, Dec 1, 2015
    Last edited: Dec 1, 2015