Ok, so I just started dating someone. We were pretty close friends for a while, and I suspected the liked me for like 6 months, then didn't think they did anymore, than /really/ suspected it. Turns out they had a huge crush on me for 2 years? Well anyway they asked me out, I figured it couldn't hurt to just try it and see where it goes. Well the relationship itself is fine, but I get this weird thing where half the time my feelings towards it are "OMG I THINK I'L LIKE LEGIT FALLING IN LOVE THEY ARE THE CUTEST THING EVER OMG HOW AM I SO LUCKY TO HAVE THIS WONDERFUL PERSON IN MY LIFE WE SHOULD LIKE GET MARRIED" and the other half of the time it's "I am a horrible person they deserve so much better I bet I'm being manipulative what if I never fall for them but never have the guts to break up and I'm just being so selfish and clingy" Um Is this... a normal thing to feel???? Only ever been in one other relashionship (short but kinda complicated) and only have had one other crush Like.... is this a problem with the relationship? With me? It's definitely not them
It's probably more common than people suspect, especially early in a relationship, or during the first year or so. Basically, you're getting used to establishing a level of intimacy with this person that is not the norm in most of our social relationships (even with particularly close friends, etc.). That's bound to be a bit jarring, even if things are great. But, the most important thing to do is to take a step back, realize that this person is making a choice to be with you, and that - from what you say - you want to be with them, and let that play out. Concerns about your own quality as a person and whether or not you "deserve" them, etc., sounds more like depression or similar thought patterns talking. It's scary to be vulnerable. But don't let that get in the way of a good thing - or of you enjoying a good thing.
