There was a weird thing that happened today that I am not sure how to handle. I want to be able to get to the bottom of it, but I don't know how to do that. Basically, I asked my Mom if she would ever refuse to speak to me because of the things I was saying related to my sexuality. At first, she just said, "Is it the most important thing if your parents speak to you?" Granted, I have asked this question numerous times about unrelated things, and they are both very sick of hearing it. She usually doesn't answer me. She did finally answer that this would never happen and that they would both always speak to me. Then, when I went upstairs I overheard the following conversation or so I thought: Dad: Why do you say things ambiguously, it's like your trying to incite. Mom: I don't know...or something to that effect Dad: Why were you talking about it like there is uncertainty? Mom: Well, there would be. Later on- Dad: Asks the same question as before Mom: There's uncertainty in life. While I was around I brought up the conversation, and they are claiming not to have made these comments. My Dad said that when he asked the question he did, that Mom responded that there wouldn't be uncertainty rather than that there would....... Maybe I misheard it? They also both have said that they would continue speaking with me no matter what. To my face, they have said that they want me to accept myself and that they love me regardless. Aside from a comment when asked that they find it "disturbing", there hasn't been anything that would seem like this kind of anger or hatred. My Mom has also said that she'd always want to have a "close" relationship with me regardless of who I am with or what I do with my life. They've seemed somewhat accepting in a lot of regards, but given this conversation that I think I heard I wonder if they are putting on a face. I wonder if they are planning to pretend to be loving and accepting, hoping that this will just "blow over". Then, if my life did evolve this way........ they would just suddenly stop speaking to me forever. I don't know, maybe I misheard and this isn't the case though. My question is basically does anybody have any suggestions for how I could sort through to figure out if they are lying to me when they say that they accept me or if they are sincere. This conversation that I thought I overheard scares me, because it scares me to think that I could have to go through disownment. It would be traumatic, and I don't know how I would get through that. If I somehow misheard (even though I really thought I heard right, of course I could've been wrong I've misheard stuff before and would and wouldn't could sound similar), I wouldn't want to be taking it out on them for having said that if they didn't. I feel like I just need a way now to see if they are lying to me or not.
