Hi all! It's been quite awhile since I've been on here last. I've finished my first semester of college now and would like some advice on my best friend I've made at college, Ryan. So, I came out to Ryan in the end of October and that was a big day for me. I had been hinting at it in the days coming up to to it. I came out to him by telling him the story of how I almost hooked up with this guy Mark on our floor (I didn't...long story). He's the first person I ever came out to in person and that was big to me. I wanted to make sure I came out to him in person and I did. Since then he's been changing too. He's been using the word "fag" less and making fewer gay jokes about my roommate and in general. He's asked me before if I'm attracted to him and have told him countless times that I'm not...which I don't think I am...but my dick seems to think otherwise. See Ryan and I will cuddle in the same bed or wrestle around some, he's even just sat on my crotch before. Admittedly when him and I wrestle I will occasionally get boners and I really hate it. I'm not into Ryan, I know that. I mean he's stripped down to just his boxers before and I change right in front of him after my showers most days. I see him shirtless all the time and am plain just not attracted to him. I'm just afraid that one day we'll be wrestling or goofing around and he'll notice the fact that I have a boner. Any advice guys? Missed you all!
It sounds like you have what I get after exercising, when I randomly get turned on. I don't really know what you could do to prevent him from seeing your boner aside from wearing really tight underwear, not wrestling if you think it'd happen or running away when you start getting one (I know it sounds drastic but if you want to do it and you really don't want him noticing that may actually be the best option and if you run with a hard on it's quite visible). Or you could tell him that sometimes you feel uncomfortable wrestling because you get a boner. Just be upfront. But I don't know how he'd react so that may not be the best option. Do you know if he's attracted to you? I'm asking because you said you told him you weren't countless times, so I'm assuming he's asked more than once.
I completely understand that a guy can get a boner from just about anything...it's just frustrating that I get one when I'm goofing off with my best friend of all people. I know why he's asked and it's not because he's into guys. He's not exactly the most LGBT friendly person, he's getting better definitely...but he could be better. He's told me many times that he doesn't care if a guy is gay as long as they don't flirt with him or are into him. He gets uncomfortable at that idea...which is why I'm afraid of him ever noticing the random boners I get.