I promise I will try keep this as short as i can. Basically my boyfriend and I will be 1 year soon. For both of us this was our first serious relationship and also lost our virginity to each other. The sex has been good (to what i know) but my boyfriend has been having these melt downs as his penis goes down when we start to have anal intercourse and is hard for him to keep it erected...Does this happen to any of you? He refuses Sex a lot! He admitted that he feels ashamed about his penis going down during a heated moment and i can imagine its effecting him as it would to be if I was the top. Now to top it all off he has admitted recently that he doesn't like sex, he doesn't want to do it anyone as It does not lead to anywhere. He said that anal does not give him pleasure and that he doesn't feel anything while doing it. He says he is tired of sex because it doesn't lead nowhere and is crushed since he doesn't feel anything while being a top, meaning he does feel he is going to cum while doing anal. He then comes by masturbating after i finish off. We have never changed roles yet and he doesn't want to. Does this happen to you guys while being a top? My boyfriend says he tries being he doesn't feel anything and this is worrying me. Thanks
Sex and sexuality a very psychological activity. It is very common that depression, anxieties, stress and various other issues maybe causing this and reducing his sex drive in general. Losing erection while having sex is fairly common both in gay and straight sex. It is important that these underlying problems are investigated if you both want to have satisfying sex life. I advice that you openly and honestly try to talk to your boy friend. Also, be aware and understanding that talking about this is probably not easy thing for him and he might rather talk to a councilor or psychologist about his issues. You can suggest he does that. ---------- Post added 13th Jan 2016 at 08:37 PM ---------- How old are you guys btw?
I am 22 and he is 25. I have many time told him to go to a councilor or a psychologist but he doesn't want to. He is very much an introvert therefore when having these conversations he just shuts down and doesn't say much. An important thing to add he says that his sex drive was ALWAYS very minimal, for him it is ok to masturbate once every 3-4 days he doesn't feel the need as much as i do. I cant understand how he doesn't feel anything either
Does your BF think there is a problem with your sex life or with his lack of enjoyment over sex? I mean it is possible that he has a very low sex drive (I'm similar. If I'm not stressed or bored I feel no urge to masturbate at all. I started masturbating only because school nurse told it prevented nocturnal emissions.) Do you know if he has any other issues? Anxiety or depression, childhood trauma etc?
I don't think so, i think its just lack of motivation for anything he does lol. He isn't successful in life do thats puts him down do and has had depression in the past too.
