i'm not even dating this guy but some how i feel like i put some kind a though in the guy head that we was dating just because i'm a guy in my head that really don't stop guys from trying to hit on me i did not really fine anything wrong with it that's kinda why i let it go on it's really starting to be one of my pet peeves he toke it far to me when he called me his girlfriend i just ignore him i guess i can say this now that every one knows nothing in my life has change i still look like the gender that i'm not and every one around still treats me like the gender no process have started if i say this i feel like people will just get the wrong idea yes i love men but i just hate how guys just only see me as a piece of meat it pretty much sucks and it's really hard to explain to them they just pretty much look at me like hey i see breasts and a vagina so your a woman i don't want to be just a piece of cake to a man instead of being his girlfriend i want be his boyfriend instead of him thinking of me as one of his tomboyish friends i just want to be one of his guy friends i just want him to treat me like i'm one of the guys it just seem like it just does not matter what i do i will never be one of the guys i've tried so many times but they just see me as a wife or a girlfriend how can i prove that i'm not or is it to late? some times i just feel like it's to late some times i just feel like it's all my fault it's me that's why he could not treat me as i need for him to treat me and love me the way that i need him to love me i already know that i'm going to just attract more straight guys in my head it just keeps yelling to me that he a straight guy and my body is just telling me to just go with it already so far i just feel like guy's are not worth my time all what i'm hearing from them these's days is some lame o excuses or they just saying reasons why i should sleep with them why did i have to like guy's i'm starting to feel like guy's are annoying yes i already know there is no such thing of a prince charming he died along time ago along with how a real man should be treating me yes guy's these's day's only want and care about one thing and that is how they going to get their dick wet tonight i told him how i flet about guy's just want it to dip in and leave you wanna know what he askk for? a blow job he ask me to give him head it is if i did not just tell him about that another pet peeve i don't know what love is anymore when i was little i though i know now i don't know i'm lost and beside's i can't go the other way well that way is toward woman i would not know what to do with them so my hobby's now is watching and reading boy on boy love it's better then real life well for me it is better then real life guy's just will never treat me like i'm one of the cute uke's in the manga looking at trap yaoi just get's me mad jealous cause i secretly want that kinda life i know even if i was a real boy guy's would probably still only care about getting their dick wet that is one thing that i learn guy's will be guy's it really don't matter what they like they all seem to only care about one thing i don't know how to even start my story i just feel like it's to hard and i will never start it how do i begin how what is the next step? all what i can really think in my head is the new start
