Okay so I met this girl online not long ago and I'm pretty sure I'm in love with her. We have so much in common and we are always messaging each other. The only problem is is that we live on opposite sides of London so we could only meet on rare occasions. Thing is I have a massive crush on her but I can't ask her out if I can't ever see her. Also I'm scared that if I do it over text and she rejects me it will be really awkward and she may not text me again. Please help!!
One lesson life has recently taught me is that the purpose of love is to feel it, to take it in. I used to worry and angst about "but where can this go? I have a partner I don't want to leave. And yet I want this to go somewhere too!" And I would spin and spin myself through this cycle...and yes, in several of those cases, the person in question was on another continent or on the other side of this one, or whatever. And then this lesson hit. It's an important one. *Feel* the love. Take it in. Find out if she feels similarly (either ask overtly, or assess without asking point-blank, if you can do that). Don't worry about where it'll go...if it's meant to, it'll go where it's supposed to go; have no doubts. And across London is hardly infeasible. I mean, yeah, it's a big city...but at least you're on the same friggin' island. Finally, your concerns about "if you do and she rejects you" are exactly those faced by everyone who ever wanted to date anyone, ever. I have no help there, except to continue the dialog (soaking in the positive energy you get from it all the while), and continue to try to assess whether she feels similarly. If she does, then there's no reason to worry she'd turn you down, right?
I'm going to move this over to Family, Friends and Relationships for you. It may get a bit buried in Chit Chat, and I think you'll get some more replies over there!
OP, I'm in a very similar situation as you. I told the person how I felt and they are still communicating with me, so I take that as a good sign. If you never ask, you never know. Good luck
Gotta say I disagree with the past two poster that you can't know without asking. Some people can't know without asking. Others can. There's also no guarantee that you *will* know if you *do* ask. Some people are hedgy on that kind of question, and don't answer frankly right away...sometimes, of course, that's because they don't understand their own feelings enough yet...it can take time. But all that said, there is also something magical about expressing your feelings to another person. Not asking, but telling, and seeing the response (whether or not you get an immediate confirmation that your feelings are reciprocated). I have to say that given what you've told us, I'd be a little surprised if she just vanished on you.
biAnnika, I should have used different wording. What I meant was if you don't ask someone out then you'll never know. Not asking if that person likes you. That's too forward. But I agree that there is something magical and freeing about expressing how you feel for someone. It's wonderful and scary as hell at the same time.
