My brother is disappointed. Need some courage.

why don't you encourage him to go out instead of using online dating service? So he can build his courage and confident over time than sitting behind computer and only do the msg thingy. You can go out with him and be his wingman even. Online dating service is like double edged sword, you can read a lot about people detail but they also pick people like they were items rather than human, bad job> click next, not good looking>click next and so on. His analogy pretty much show he is lacking of confident and that make him less of a "target."

 

Most people that you contact or who contact you on a dating site are dead ends. He need patience...

 

To me it sounds like your brother might have self-confidence or self-esteem issues that he needs to address first.

 

I agree with Euler. Once he gets over his issues, he'll have the confidence and self-esteem to date someone.

 

I think you nailed it right on the head with that statement.

Online dating sites are chock full of people that will cut off all communication as soon as the next profile comes across their screen that seems to be "better looking" than yours. People like this are shallow, insecure, and lack empathy. Why on earth would he ever want to hook up with someone like that anyway?

Put it this way: He's better off figuring out that a girl will drop him without a thought to go after the next "great looking guy" sooner rather than later. Better to figure that out before even meeting, as opposed to figuring it out after a few dates.

Online dating is strictly a numbers game. For every X amount of rejections, there will be Y amount of great prospects. X is much much larger than Y. But each X means you're one step closer to a Y!

 

Sounds to me like your brother has low confidence/self-esteem issues. He might be best off joining some sort of organised activity, whether that's an evening class in something new, a sport group, something like that. This is a good way to increase his confidence and help him socialise, it is also an opportunity to meet girls and become friendly with them. Perhaps, as someone else suggested, you could go along at least at first.

Some people date, some people are not cut out for the harsh world of dating - they are more comfortable making friends and assessing someone's personality and interest that way, in a less pressured environment. I had at least 5 long-term, maybe 7 or 8 boyfriends all told, and I didn't meet any of them on a date, they were all friends, or people I met through sport/music clubs.

I can empathise with your position. I have a lovely and very shy brother who has struggled socially in the past. I worried that he would settle for anyone, even if they weren't suited, because his low confidence made him think that was the best he was going to get. He is now in his early thirties, single but so much more confident, with tons of friends often through clubs/societies, and he has had girlfriends, and when they haven't suited, he's broken it off. That showed me how much he's developed and matured. He's a fantastic guy and some day soon he's going to meet the right girl and make her very happy.

 

I think it is better to encourage him by showing other persons experiences that are motivational. An experienced where the person find it when he waited for the right time the god give to him. It could be very nice to teach your brother to be patient because the right one will also come in right time.