Some background - I'm asexual (technically I'm pansexual, but I have a low enough sex drive that I just say asexual) and hear a lot of people talk about sex or finding people to have sex with. This makes no sense to me. I understand from a biological perspective why sex is important, and I understand that people find sex pleasurable due to the orgasms. What I don't get is why people go for sex - it seems like a hassle to me because you have to meet people, talk to people, spend time having genital interactions, and run risks of pregnancy and STDs. Doesn't masturbation solve any issue with people desiring orgasms? (It works well enough for me) I'd like to know if other people could provide insight on this. Cheers, all.
You said yourself. You have low sex drive while most other people don't. It's a bit like some people are always hungry and others are not. Most other people have internal urge to have sex and that's why they do it. It's not a choice for them how to feel.
1. What the poster above said. Some people have an internal urge to just have sex. 2. Some people are more social and prefer to interact with others as opposed to just being on their own 3. It feels better emotionally to be with someone else, even if you are not looking for a relationship 4. It feels better physically than masturbating
Also, remember that sex has a strong cultural factor involved on it (not only in humans, but in other animals too). Some species, for example, have sex primarly to show dominance. The alpha male/female have all the group "available", and that is a sign of power. Others may have sex when the alpha isn't watching, for example. In my opinion, that happens to humans too in a certain way. For example (and i'll choose something with a common stereotype, forgive me) the straight guy who is sitting on a bar with his friends and bragging about how many girls he kissed last night. He isn't doing that only because it feels good, but mostly because, in his circle, it shows how amazing he is, how powerful he is (yeah, it doesn't impress me either, but i believe there is a strong biological and cultural factor involved there). That's not the only single reason for sex. Of course, it feels great if you do it with someone you are attracted to, and that's a reason to seek it if you want to. I cannot say it is better than masturbation, but it feels different. However, in my point of view, the cultural factor is more important when we are discussing "why people are so crazy about it".
The easiest way I can think of to answer this is to ask similar questions. "Why would you bother eating a steak, when lettuce fills your stomach in exactly the same way and costs less?" Or perhaps more on point, "Why would you play multiplayer when single player is available?" Masturbation is awesome. It fulfills the basic sex drive, and it can be enjoyable in its own right. But sex with another person adds a bunch of extra dimensions to the scenario. And it's far more intricate than just "there are more body parts now". To pick just one, giving another human being sexual pleasure is an awesome feeling that one can't really replicate at home by yourself. And, to put it plainly, people do a lot of stuff that doesn't interest me in the slightest. But they seem to enjoy it, so I just assume we're wired differently. Lex
Fair enough, folks. I appreciate the input. And like you've pointed out, I still don't (but probably won't ever) get it - but thanks anyways.
Do you have trouble understanding why some people like some foods while others don't? This is exactly the same matter.
Yeah, I couldn't imagine life without sex. It's an amazing feeling when you're intimate with someone that you love. Not only is it pleasurable, it's quite fun. Masturbation is boring to me, honestly. Unless, I was with my significant other. Idk, maybe I'm just different :icon_wink I have people close to me who haven't had sex in years, so I suppose I understand both views. They just don't view sex as an important part of their life and that's totally fine with me.
