Hey there, I could use some help. So I recently made a dating profile online (once again) and have had some success meeting guys. I am supposed to go on a date Tuesday but it seems like right before a date comes I want to cancel and I think it is due to self-confidence issues. I only had one picture on the profile and I think I look decent in it. I always fear a guy seeing me in person and realizing he doesn't find me cute or something. I've been having really bad self-confidence issues lately; I just look in a mirror and feel ugly - I blame it on acne, but I have reached the point where I don't even know if I would find myself attractive without acne. How can I go on dates with guys when I don't even feel confident in myself? I'm kind of lost on what to do. Any advice? Should I cancel the date if I am feeling this down on myself? I know this lack of confidence is not attractive. Also, does anyone else struggle with something like this? Thanks in advance for any help. :icon_sad:
I struggle with that sometimes. I'm not very experienced in dating but I think knowing that whatever guy you're going to date may just as well be nervous or feeling insecure about the date too, could help. Because really, I'm sure they are. I don't know what you look like, but I'm sure you don't look the way your insecurity is making you feel you do. When you feel like this and look in the mirror it's easy to only look at all the little details and focus on things you think don't look good - rather than seeing the big picture - which is often very different. The you see yourself is I'm sure much different than the way others see you. And I'm sure you've got a lot to offer besides that anyway! Whenever I feel insecure like that I just remember we're all human beings, you are, the person you're dating is. So don't stress. And think about it like this: if you were dating someone and let's say they had some little imperfection or something, anything, that probably wouldn't change things much because you'd still date them and if you liked their personality then that's that. Everyone's got imperfections, and they're often not as prevalent as many people think their own are. So go for it! I'm sure it will go great!
Sometimes our self-confidence goes down and it doesn't feel great. Don't force yourself to go on a date if you don't want to. In the end it's your decision and I can only give advice. Personally, I don't think you should worry on looks. I have a friend who always points out her imperfections and says that she's not good enough. She's afraid that guys won't like her because the way she looks. However, I think she's really pretty, cute and has a great personality when she thinks the opposite. I don't think that you should just assume that a guy will not like you because of the way you look. Maybe someone else sees you differently the way you see yourself. In the end, personality tops looks. You won't look as attractive when you're like 80 years old. It's the heart that counts. No matter how old a person grows they will still make you laugh or comfort you just the way they did when you first met. I know in modern day people stress on looks a lot. You see girls get boob jobs or whatever. And you see people judge the way that others look. When you get older I think people search for what's at the core and not on the surface. I know that lacking self-confidence may make fell that you seem unattractive. Everyone goes through self-doubt somewhere in there life and it's okay to feel that way. Some people don't even notice how someone's feeling. Don't just assume that people will dislike you. Don't be afraid to take chances and good luck to whichever path you may take.
