Cutting off a parent - advice needed..

Hey all-

I need some advice on cutting out an unacceptimg parent...

Brand new to this site. Short background: I came out as gay in fall 2013, around my 23rd birthday. I was a wreck. I already deal w/ OCD and other anxiety issues (my whole family - immediate and extended do), so this was a very difficult experience. My mother was very accepting and was confused why I hadn't come out earlier. She was very loving and said she'd be excited to go to my wedding with my future partner. She also reassured me I would have a great life, could have children and that she loved me wholly. She did mention she was nervous for my safety and suggested I stay in Big Cities and avoid the South (lol).

Diddo for my brother and sister - very accepting and loving. My sister is even involved in LGBT activism and my brother is a filmmaker who has shot films about LGBT issues.

My father was a different story. He told me "I love you, but not your choices" and ended it at that. He's pretty religious. Even though I have the full love and support of my other immediate family members, I still feel absolutely crushed (have so since 2013... And am still working through this 2.5 years later.) I moved to California in 2015 and am now only realizing how emotionally devastated I am from this. Whenever I come back home or call home he makes comments like on marriage equality "see you agree w/ me - gays shouldn't get married" and things like that. He's your typical republican, religious, etc. I don't think he realizes how damaging these comments are to me as a person? I guess he'd prefer I love a dark and lonely existence in the closet?

My question:
I've decided I need to follow Dan Savage's advice and cut him out until he is able to be emotionally supportive of me as a whole person. Am I too late to the game? For so long I have bottled up my despair regarding this and took his criticism and judgement on the chin. I've recently realized that this was actually a big deal and very pivotal moment for me (being away has helped, as I used to be financially dependent). I believe it has a lot to do with why I have trouble with committed relationships; feelings of unworthiness; unacceptance of myself; Etc. I've always been a very caring person putting others needs before my own. I'm at a point where I can't do that anymore: I want to move forward with MY life. If someone is STILL unacceptimg of me as a WHOLE person, then I don't need them in my life. Life is short and having depression/anxiety every time you talk to someone (weekly currently) is no way to live and is only putting up barriers to a full enjoyable meaningful life - One I deserve. But I still feel bad - I know his childhood was rough; relationship w/ his parents was and still is difficult (very bible bang-y, depression, mean); sometimes I wonder if he is in the closet (another story). I basically feel a lot of compassion for his situation, so this is very difficult.

Any advice from people who have done this at this late stage would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks.

 

My father is a republican/conservative who does not support gay rights, so not specifically the party, but him (although this is part of their platform... Look at the 2016 nominees). My point isn't to make this political. Thanks