So I've talked about this person a few times on here and recently I've been thinking that maybe I should come out to him, and who knows he might be okay with it but, I don't know, we tend to rant and ramble when we hang out and we have talked about the LGBT community, and I know his opinions on gay and lesbian people but, bisexual is still hazy, so far he seems okay about equality but, so many people in the world don't even think that being bisexual is possible! And not knowing where he stands on that is petrifiying (hope to god I spelt that right, sry if i didnt) and this person, let's call him R- is like my big brother, I can't count how many times he's bragged on and on about how he was gonna beat up the first boy to treat me wrong, and I don't really know how to tell him that might not be an option. I know I'm rambling as I said it's sort of in my blood, if I wasn't terribly shy and had anxiety about people in general, I would be on the debate team (if that's still a thing idk) I just really needed to get this out of my system and I really need some advice, and the reason why I'm so hesitant to say anything since if this was anyone outside my family and they seemed okay, then whether I knew or not about how they stood on bisexuality, I would tell them and just not care how they felt, but this is my cousin and I am Christian and he is okay with equality on a legal standpoint, but not religious. I hope anyone who reads this that is not christian or just doesn't understand why this might but so dear to me, will just let me say that when I get married, whether it be to a man, woman, or someone of a third gender I want it to be in the eyes of God, anyone reading this who isn't christian or doesn't even want to marry someone that is religious (yes there are very nice people out there who will not date someone who is religious) I hope that you will give me the respect and accept that this is how I wish to live my life as I would give you the same respect (also like to mention, even though I'm christian, and even though my mother might not be happy about it, I would be open to marrying someone of a different religion, and also atheists and agnostics, etc. I didn't want you to think I was closed minded about that ) So basically, HELP
Bisexuality can sometimes be a difficult way to come out. As you pointed out some people simply don't believe it in or in other cases they think you're just experimenting or really half lying that you're gay. However, you could always ask him what his views are on bisexuality the next time an LGBT conversation starts up. Or if you're worried he won't believe you're bisexual you can just point out that if he's okay with someone by lesbian/gay, then he should be okay with you being bi. The dating idea is basically the same, but it doesn't invalidate your bisexuality because you'd still be attracted to guys. At the same time though you shouldn't have to feel the need to prove you're bi, unless of course you want to take that stand and emphasize it daily. Some people are like that (me for example). Chances are though, if he's for equality for the LGBT community, he should definitely be okay with you being bi even if he for any reason assumes you're experimenting or just a lesbian at first (which some people do at first and sometimes it just take time for people to accept that).
Thank you, I hope to tell him at some point soon, I'm not sure if I should wait maybe until I have more than just my parents to back me up because he can't really keep secrets and my town isn't the most accepting, but to be fair that's what I thought about another friend I have who I told, and as far as I know she hasn't told anyone (hopefully including her boyfriend and sister) I wouldn't know if she did tell anyone though, we live in different towns and generally aren't in the same circles to begin with, so for all I know I might be completely out to her entire school, and I'm rambling again sorry. Really though, thank you for this, I really needed this and even though I literally have no friends irl that are in the LGBT community, it's refreshing to know that people like you are here to calm my overreacting mind. Thank you.
