(TW: Self harm and suicide I guess) So long story short, today I found out my ex fiance' lied about his name. And I cried tears of joy when I found this out. I was really badly depressed and suicidal when he broke up with me, upon me discovering he'd lied to me about various things. I blamed myself for everything that happened between me and him, believing my assumptions about him being a liar ended up being wrong. I self harmed and shut myself away from the world because I truly believed I did not deserve to be alive after he left me. I thought, "that's it, he was the only person who would even think of being with me, and I fucked it up. I deserve every ounce of pain I get" Today I was able to try tears of joy and say "It wasn't my fault, It really wasn't my fault." Let this just be a quick hint of advice to everyone here: If your relastionship is causing you pain, get out. Now. You deserve better. There's a better person out there for you, but until you find them, look after yourself first and foremost. Thank you.