1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

How to ask someone out if you're both in the closet?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by TheAnon32, Mar 7, 2016.

Thread Tools

Thread Tools

  1. TheAnon32

    TheAnon32
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2015
    Messages:
    131
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Montreal
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    There is this guy that I like from my lessons and I don't mean to stereotype but I'm 99.9% sure he is gay. Like he is flaming! However, we are both not out. I'm a little less obvious and for the most part people assume I'm straight. How do I go about asking him out?
     
    #1 TheAnon32, Mar 7, 2016
  2. Distant Echo

    Distant Echo
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Sep 29, 2015
    Messages:
    462
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    on the verge of somewhere
    Well, if anything, both not being out might be easier? Ask him out for a casual coffee. If you're wrong, no harm done. If you're right, well, good luck
     
    #2 Distant Echo, Mar 7, 2016
  3. Hizaki

    Hizaki
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2015
    Messages:
    0
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Not Mongolia, as far as I know
    The short answer: privately!

    You should lay the ground rules. Like if you two plan on being an item in public or not. After, of course, asking if he likes men. Perhaps there is a way to ask if he likes men and if he would go out with you, at the same time, but I can't think of a good one other than being to-the-point.

    Good luck and sorry for barely helping if at all! ^_^
     
    #3 Hizaki, Mar 7, 2016
  4. TheAnon32

    TheAnon32
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2015
    Messages:
    131
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Montreal
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    So I sat next to him in class and he seemed kind of distant. I know at times I could be unintentionally flirty so I think he may have been just upset that I was talking allot with the girl next to me. I know that feeling far to well when you think your crush is straight. Anyways I was looking at him and something caught my eye. There were some small cuts on his arm just barely exposed from his sleeve. I had a friend who would harm them self and It looked quite similar. In other words they looked self inflicted. They didn't look fresh though. This may sound shallow but I don't want to deal with that in my life right now. I think I will let him go for now.
     
    #4 TheAnon32, Mar 9, 2016
  5. danobi

    danobi
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Nov 12, 2013
    Messages:
    45
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    UK
    Gender:
    Male
    I think, that scars shouldnt be a deal breaker. Maybe dont go in with the intention of relationship. But friend. It might be what you both need? A confidant about your sexuality and general school life
     
    #5 danobi, Mar 11, 2016
  6. TheAnon32

    TheAnon32
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2015
    Messages:
    131
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Montreal
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Yea I guess you got a point
     
    #6 TheAnon32, Mar 11, 2016
  7. Nobo

    Nobo
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jan 3, 2016
    Messages:
    0
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Tonawanda
    You should try to help him he might be in pain from not being able to come out as gay for one reason or another
     
    #7 Nobo, Mar 11, 2016
  8. A13Aflowers

    A13Aflowers
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2015
    Messages:
    9
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    London
    Gender:
    Female

    Agree here ^^
     
    #8 A13Aflowers, Mar 11, 2016
(You must log in or sign up to post here.)