So there the guy at school I like. He's 15/freshman. Cool. Silly. And awesome. Also like I said before my school is pretty small. Classes are 4-12 students. He's in 3 of my periods. History, Lunch and Math. The thing i know we're friends but recently we rarely talk to each other those periods. When I see him in hallway I look he looks and all I can see is sadness in his eyes. Recently he's seemed so depressed. Sometimes I just want to ask "what's wrong?". But I can't because i have social anxiety. And what's surprising is that I've never had this around him ever since we became friends. I mean sometimes I felt scared or embarrassed to talk to him but this time is completely different. I just hope he get better. He's been like this for 2 weeks now. And all I can think about is what's going on in his mind, crossing my fingers hoping nothing comes along the line of suicidal thoughts. all I'm hoping for is his safety. I SWEAR ONE DAY I WILL GRAB THE COURAGE TO STAND UP AGAINST THOSE BULLIES FOR HIM! I also hope to come out in my school, I mean Its not like I'm gonna be here forever
Ow, I know my school's days. I was terrible at speaking to people. You know what? Now I just think "Nothing is gonna happen", "I'm the best", "I love myself", "Pain is an illusion". I mean, I tried to focus more on me, on what I think, not even caring about people reactions. It was difficult, I know. I had to join some acting classes and it made me feel really better. I could even speak to 1 hundred people on the school. I'm also going to be an English teacher, so I can not be timid anymore. There's one more thing: EYES. They mean nothing. Look into someone's eyes and let them look back, don't fear them, because nothing is gonna happen (but please, don't stare people randomly). Most of my anxiety was caused when someone looked at me. But then I tried something funny, that "only my eyes could affect other people, not the contrary". So, again, I prioritized myself first. It's not like being selfish, it's just a tool for feeling confident. Your intention sounds awesome! Think about how you would make him feel better, how can it help him in his life. When you visualize someone from his perspective, it makes everything more clear. Don't fear the fear. Speak to him nicely. I hope you find a a good way to solve this. ^^
