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FWB Situation - Experience, Advice? TMI Warning

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by Invidia, Mar 23, 2016.

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  1. Invidia

    Invidia Guest

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    Hey y'all lovely EC'ers. :smilewave I've got some stuff on my mind and thought this would be a good place to turn. Hope it's not TMI. If you're a youngling, perhaps you ought to look away, yeah? x

    I'm currently in what I guess I would call a friends with benefits relationship with a guy friend of mine. We've hooked up twice the last few months, me giving him oral (he asked if he could return the favor but I said I wasn't comfortable, so.)

    First question: We haven't even touched first or second base yet, as we went straight to third. XD Um... is there a good way to go about including this if we have sex again?

    Second question: He wasn't perfectly hygiene down there... He wasn't, like, dirty or anything, really, but... I'd have wished for him to go take a quick shower or so and wash up down there. Is there any way I might convey this in a nice way?

    Third question: I'm interested in taking it a step further (fourth base), and I think I can sense some mutual interest... Any ideas on how to go about asking, if I were to do it? (He's been doing all the asking so far; I'm quite submissive sexually.)

    Fourth question: If the above was fulfilled - what about cum, and condoms? I know I'm his first so he can't have an STD (right?) And, well... I would kind of like for him to cum inside... Sorry TMI, but I just don't know how to say it in a more careful way. XD
    Any advice or stuff I should think about here?

    That's all I could think about now, I'll write more questions later if I think of any. :slight_smile: Thanks if you've read so far, and thanks if you leave a comment. :kiss:
     
    #1 Invidia, Mar 23, 2016
  2. HerrinDesFeuers

    HerrinDesFeuers
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    No, that's not right! Many diseases that can be transmitted sexually can also be transmitted in other ways, so there's always a risk.
     
    #2 HerrinDesFeuers, Mar 23, 2016
    Last edited: Mar 23, 2016
  3. Invidia

    Invidia Guest

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    Hmm... sche**e XD That's true... What do you think, should I ask him to get tested (and maybe do it myself?)
     
    #3 Invidia, Mar 23, 2016
  4. HerrinDesFeuers

    HerrinDesFeuers
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    Either that or you should use a condom.
     
    #4 HerrinDesFeuers, Mar 23, 2016
  5. Invidia

    Invidia Guest

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    yeah... I'll keep that in mind, thx. xo
     
    #5 Invidia, Mar 23, 2016
  6. CharacterStudy

    CharacterStudy
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    Use protection and never believe anything people say about that. It's too much of a risk. And always get both of you tested before you go without protection, but it should really be in a serious relationship. You just don't know if you can believe what people tell you.
     
    #6 CharacterStudy, Mar 24, 2016
  7. AKTodd

    AKTodd
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    You could either start to initiate these in a low key way and let him follow your lead (with level of intensity increasing to whatever you are both comfortable with). Or you could suggest/ask verbally ('Would you like to kiss me? Would you like me to kiss you? Do you like it when I do this?' Etc.).

    You could suggest you both take a shower, either along the lines of 'I'm feeling kind of grubby, I think I'll take a shower.' Then, when you're done, you could say something like 'Would you like to take one too?' You might also say how much you like how it feels to come out of a hot shower or the like and hopefully he'll want to experience it too. If you're comfortable going there, you might also consider: 'I'm feeling kind of grubby, let's take a shower.' Or 'I'm feeling kind of grubby, I think I'll take a shower. Would you like to join me?' or the like.

    Something along the lines of 'I want you inside me.' tends to get the point across. Not sure how subtle that is. I'm afraid I've never been very good at subtle.

    Condoms always, even if you've been together for decades.

    My 2c worth,

    Todd
     
    #7 AKTodd, Mar 24, 2016
  8. Invidia

    Invidia Guest

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    Thanks to both of you, Todd and Study. : )
     
    #8 Invidia, Mar 25, 2016
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