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Suffocated from being in the closet

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by JayR, Mar 26, 2016.

  1. JayR

    Regular Member

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    So basically, I've been hiding my sexuality since the day I realized I am gay. Like honestly, I knew I was different since 3rd grade and now I'm 21 years old and still in the dark. I think I perfected the act of being straight, but everyday is a struggle. When I let my guards down my, how do I describe this, "fabulous side" comes out and it's hard to act straight all tough with judging eyes. I know this is self destructive but I need to convince people I'm straight at until I am ready to come out. But I feel like, the walls I built to hide my sexuality are slowly withering. I guess I just need help on how to act more straight, and you know, just advice in general. My family doesn't know I'm gay. No one else knows except my best friend.
     
  2. cakepiecookie

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    What's holding you back from coming out? I'm not saying you should do it if you're not ready, but if you've reached a point where it's causing you so much stress then maybe that's a sign that it needs to happen sooner rather than later.
     
  3. Missy

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    I understand your vulnerability. People can be very judging!
    You are still young. Come out when you are ready is my advice. And to people you are comfortable with!
     
  4. JayR

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    I am afraid of what my parents will say. They are conservative christians and my mom dad won't like it a bit if he knew. I'm just a coward I guess, but it's really pain everyday especially when they are making plans for me. Imagining me having a family and giving them grandchildren. And ugh, I cant give that to them. :icon_sad:

    ---------- Post added 29th Mar 2016 at 10:22 PM ----------

    I wish there's an escape out of this. I'm trying to prepare myself but I'm too afraid to do it.