Is a parent saying "i wanna beat the shit out of you", but not doing it still abuse?

Re: Is a parent saying "i wanna beat the shit out of you", but not doing it still abu

Not necessarily. If they were saying degrading malicious things that would be verbal abuse but I think this just falls under threats

 

Re: Is a parent saying "i wanna beat the shit out of you", but not doing it still abu

Are you serious? Of course it's abuse! Verbal abuse! Don't listen to this guy :dry:

If one of your parents is threatening to harm you in any way (especially to that extremity) then I'd strongly advise you to seek help or if things get worse try and get out of there. It only takes one final push for them to actually act on their words.

 

Re: Is a parent saying "i wanna beat the shit out of you", but not doing it still abu

IMHO, No. I come from a family where strict upbringing was deemed necessary, but show of force was rarely used. Verbal strictness was used quite often to make sure my sister and I learnt what was wrong and right. I agree that it is necessary to make sure children and young adults know to distinguish right from wrong until they get to a responsible age to distinguish it on their own.

I find it silly (frankly speaking here) that nowadays people think a slap on the cheek or scolding warrants calling CPS (Child Protective Services). Again this is not me agreeing with the more stricter and abusive environments. Just saying.

 

Re: Is a parent saying "i wanna beat the shit out of you", but not doing it still abu

I think it depends a little bit of how it was said. Was it said as a joke or was it threatening? Some people just have weird sense of humor. But if it is said angry and threatening way, then it is not something anyone should approve. Especially telling that to kids, it can be very frightening and traumatizing. That is not something that falls under strict parenting. And parents should teach their children to talk about problems, not threat with violence.

I don't know what else happens in your family, but maybe you should talk to someone about it. Especially if it turns into physical. Slapping a child is not okay, an adult is a lot bigger and it can be seriously frightening. There are always other ways, and if there aren't anymore then its child services that need to help. And think about it, as an adult, do you think you would approve someone slapping you? I wouldn't. But a kid usually can't slap back or call a police.

I know that you aren't a kid anymore, but you are still living at home (at least that's what i assumed), and that is not a healthy environment to live.

 

Re: Is a parent saying "i wanna beat the shit out of you", but not doing it still abu

Coming from a household that is pretty talented with harsh language, I would say it could be abuse. I would never ever tell someone I wanted to beat them, no matter how angry I was. The thought that someone would wish to do that to me is hurtful. I think the fact that you are asking whether or not its abuse says that the way in which the words were spoken were not lightly, but full of passion, and in that case, those words were abusive.

I've had a difficult relationship with my parents, since both of them are regular heavy drinkers and have said disrespectful things to my sister and I when they drink. I love the people that they are when they're sober, and I know they love the hell out of me, but the way they act when they're drunk, and the regularity of their drinking, has really lost my respect, and I feel completely disrespected by them. I go back and forth between feeling like I'm being verbally abused and feeling like my home life isn't so bad.

Anyway, my point is, things aren't black and white, and I think that there are varying degrees of abuse. Only you can judge the situation you are in and decide whether or not you feel as though you are being abused. And, I'd like to add, I hope you're okay. I'd give you a hug if I could.

 

Re: Is a parent saying "i wanna beat the shit out of you", but not doing it still abu

Being threathened to be beaten the shit out of you is not just a parent trying to be strict. This is Verbal abuse.

 

Re: Is a parent saying "i wanna beat the shit out of you", but not doing it still abu

That is still verbal abuse.

 

Re: Is a parent saying "i wanna beat the shit out of you", but not doing it still abu

I think of it as a threat.

 

Re: Is a parent saying "i wanna beat the shit out of you", but not doing it still abu

I come from a family where that and "I'll knock you into next Wednesday" and "If you don't stop crying I'll give you a reason to cry" were common occurance, and honestly we still say it to our younger generation.
I do not see it as verbal abuse or abuse. I see it as discipline.
And if the threat was ever carried out the shit was not actually beat out of me. I was given a spanking and sent to my room while being informed about how when my parents were little they had to pick the switch off the tree themselves and I have it so much easier.

But I suppose in the modern world people will see that as abuse. I've been at the store and seen people scream abuse for a person slapping their own child on the hand for misbehaving.